Sunday, May 31, 2009

Of Stars and Black Holes on Earth

I got to thinking more about 192 lasers firing simaltaneously into the center of a house sized sphere all at once into some hydrogen and started to think about the consequences of creating a small star of hydrogen or even of a little star that turns into a black hole right in Livermore labs in the San Francisco Bay area and of what happens if the San Francisco Bay area gets sucked into a little black hole manufactured but not under control because no one yet completely understands how all this works yet.

So, even though potentially we could run everything on earth with little hydrogen powered stars, until we learn how to safely do this this little star or little black hole could be more dangerous potentially to life on earth than nuclear weapons.

Likely, we will be lucky like we have been pretty much so far in not nuking ourselves into extinction. Hopefully, we will be as lucky with little black holes, and little hydrogen stars we will create in Livermore, California soon. Also, since I live within 2 hours by car of Livermore, I hope for my families and my sake that they figure out how to do this safely too.

US lab debuts super laser

begin quote from above webpage.
“We have invented the world’s largest laser system,” actor-turned-governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said during a dedication ceremony attended by thousands including state and national officials.

“We can create the stars right here on earth. And I can see already my friends in Hollywood being very upset that their stuff that they show on the big screen is obsolete. We have the real stuff right here.”

NIF is touted as the world’s highest-energy laser system. It is located inside the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory about an hour’s drive from San Francisco.

Equipment connected to a house-sized sphere can focus 192 laser beams on a small point, generating temperatures and pressures that exist at cores of stars or giant planets.

end quote.

For 50 years the U.S. has been searching for a way to superheat hydrogen to create a small artificial star here on earth that would produce more energy than it takes to set it off. The device has finally been created by using 192 lasers shooting towards the center from a house sized sphere

begin quote: "NIF's success will be a scientific breakthrough of historic significance: the first demonstration of fusion ignition in a laboratory setting, duplicating on Earth the processes that power the stars." end quote.

The potential of this kind of technology if it is turned toward peaceful activities is almost unlimited in scope.

For example, if this technology becomes miniaturized it could be powered by small lasers in a small sphere and power with a small amount of hydrogen separated from water by electrolysis, individual homes or vehicles like cars, trucks, ships, etc. The potential here is virtually unlimited both on earth and in space.

Truth Saves

I have found in my own life that even being able to name what is bothering me can mostly free me from whatever it was that was bothering me.

In our complicated lives from birth, often we do not even know what we are upset about. It can come from as far back as conception on and have been bothering us until it is triggered by some experience or another we have. However, to gain control of our lives enough so we don't feel totally out of control and victimized, it is important to at least try to find out what is bothering us. If we can often just name what is upsetting us we can then move on having understood it at least in our minds and emotions.

For me, nothing is worse than not knowing at all what is wrong. People who are religious might say to me something like "Jesus Saves" or even "God is in control" so you don't need to know. And yes, sometimes that works for me. However, I also believe that "God helps those who help themselves". So what this means to me is that if God doesn't immediately solve my problems then I need to start solving them myself. I need to be a mature person and look for the answers and that God arranged things for me to be an adult so I could solve my own problems too.

So, for me, to be able to analyze a problem, and to gather enough facts, causes me to become empowered and to cease being a victim. And yes, there are times when life just becomes too overwhelming and I will then as I go to sleep at night say to God, "This is just too crazy, God. You need to help me or I don't want to live anymore." Usually when I do this I wake up in the morning a new person with a new perspective ready to face the world again. But in these times being able to completely let go like I'm dying when I go to sleep, seems to press the reset Button within me so I can start completely over the next morning as a fresh new person in both my own eyes and God's.

Processing Grief

Or "How to keep your spouse or significant other when you lose one of your parents".

Losing a parent to death cannot be overestimated in the unexpected changes it brings to one's life.

Because of this, thinking that one can easily breeze through a parent's death and go on with their lives without any changes is very very naive.

In my own life I have seen horrific things directly caused by the death of a parent. Even if one is in their 30s or 40s or beyond, it should not be underestimated what one likely will have to endure.

Obviously, the hardest thing to deal with is psychological and emotional. When a parent passes on any support of any kind usually leaves with the parent. So, depending upon how one has structured their life, there are going to be severe or less, monetary, mental, emotional, and psychological changes to be endured for at least 2 to 5 years after the passing of a parent. To some degree, the pain never goes away. But at least, usually after about 5 years one has come to terms with the loss first mentally, and then slowly by slowly one finds coping mechanisms to endure it. However, none of this come easily.

The most vulnerable person in all this is not you but your spouse or significant other. It is very very easy to lose your significant other or spouse during this 2 to 5 year period of grief. If your relationship with your significant other isn't very strong, losing them is very common.

For example, when my father died, my now ex-wife forbade me to spend time with him before his death. This set up a hatred toward my wife that never ended and moved me toward long term passive aggressive behavior that eventually ended our marriage 9 years later. And the only reason we stayed together that long was that we were raising (at that time) 4 children together. Though, in the end we were married 15 years, the last 9 were hell. It wasn't until her father died that she had any inkling at all of the hell I had been through with my father's passing. My ex and I no longer speak at all for the last 5 years. This was my second wife.

When my first wife's father died, luckily I was already remarried to my second wife. However, when my first wife came back from living in France, she broke up with her third husband,(I was her first), who was a french musician, mostly because she didn't want him to have mistresses which she found was common in France at that time. Then when her father died she came and spent time with my 2nd wife and I but she didn't seem right psychologically. I asked her if she was grieving her father's death but she said, "I went up to heaven with him so I know he is okay." However, I said to her, "I'm very worried that you are in denial of your grief for your father."
She said, "No. there is no grief."
This really concerned me because I knew this might mean serious psychological troubles ahead for her. The next thing I heard was that she was staying on a mutual friends large property and had shaved her head and was walking around in towels. I was afraid something like this could happen to her because of her denial of her grief.

This is a cautionary tale of how important it is to have your grief when a loved one passes on. To stuff it or to deny it can be the straw that breaks the camel's back and you may drop into temporary unsanity. I define my word unsanity as a temporary state. My first wife now is reasonably okay, but for about 2 years things were very difficult for her. Her life is okay and she is living with her latest boyfriend. The incident I'm talking about happened in the late 1980s.

However, it is important to grieve your losses. If you just stuff or deny your grief because it is inconvenient to experience it could cause much worse problems in your life, like when I and my second wife broke up from my not psychologically processing or dealing with my father's death in a healthy way or my first wife's complete denial of her grief of her father's passing and shaving her head and walking around in towels for a while. Yes. These are both extreme reactions to death. But from everyone I have spoken with they are not uncommon at all.

If you can afford it when a loved one passes seek out a grief therapist, pastor,relative or friend that you trust to help you process your grief so you can survive the passing in as healthy a way as possible.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

The Frustration

As an intuitive I'm sensing a lot of frustration in all life on earth, human and otherwise. This isn't good for "Peace on Earth" and all that. I think all life on earth has to find a way to more quickly adapt to less, less rain, less gas, maybe even less food and hopefully the food people do get is of a higher quality so more goes further and gives more miles per person so they can survive all this.

Change is never easy. For those of you who have it easy now just remember how hard it was growing up trying to adapt to everything and all the changes. Only now it is not just children and teenagers that are feeling it, it is everyone!

The biggest problem I can foresee with this level of frustration and anger worldwide is that the likely outcome will be war. Not the teeny little wars we have seen where a few thousand die since the Soviet Union collapsed but the potential for wars where millions die. This, for me, is something completely new and completely unexpected. So even the crazy stuff going on with North Korea could very easily spin out of control and North Korea could wind up being just a crater in the Pacific ocean with South Korea an island. Also, Iran and Israel might be craters too. That is just how crazy things are lately. I think just too many people have had to change too much too fast and it has left millions and sometimes billions screaming in rage and terror and confusion. When there are too many walking wounded in the world incapable of making useful decisions big wars happen. Just study the history of the 20th century!

I think prayers and being kind to those in distress that won't harm you is a good idea to keep things better glued together worldwide.


I started working as a paperboy at age 10. Then I remember at age 12 working one saturday for $1 an hour digging ditches for a new house with 2 friends. By the end of the day our hands were blistered and bleeding. $8 did not seem at all enough for the week or more it took my hands to heal but at least I felt like a man at 12. My friends and I after age 12 managed to get various kinds of jobs after school on weekends because that meant, movies, bikes, cars and starting at age 15, girlfriends. I was 15 in 1963. Getting a job then was relatively easy, not like now where 50 year olds steal those jobs away easily from 15 to 20 year olds unless those jobs come from relatives or parents. By age 21 I was so exhausted from working so much I was ready to retire. However, what it did do was to teach me by 21 I wanted to be my own boss, which I became more and more regularly after my late 20s, until by age 45 I had owned 5 businesses since my late 20s. Owning and running my own business made me happier than any job I ever had in my life.

American Beauty: The Movie

I DVRed American Beauty: the movie made in 1999 with Kevin Spacey and Annette Benning tonight. While it finished recording I watched the last Tonight Show with Jay Leno and though how ironic that Jay Leno ends tonight and General Motors ends Monday(at least as we have known it for almost a century). You know, Jay and all his cars and stuff as a collector.

Anyway, I was watching parts of American Beauty and remembering how much I felt like the character played by Kevin Spacey at times during my life. Y'know the hopeless kind of married feeling with kids and all where all your dreams and fantasies have to die to keep your marriage going and your kids having a future. The sacrifice of everything you wanted and believed in has to die for your kids. And what is even worse in a way the sacrifice of everything your wife wanted in life as well.

Both Keven Spacey's character and Annette Benning's character are in hell, suburban hell. Their daughter couldn't possibly understand how difficult her parents lives are really. She's just too young to see how it got this way.

I bet there are millions of suburbanite families just like this one throughout the United States and world who identify with this family.

However, at this point I have a different reaction to it than I did 10 years ago. Being ten years older now, 61 instead of 51 when it first came out I see it differently. What is the most sad about this movie is that the husband and wife cannot see each other as they did when they first got together and married. They actually are a good match for each other. The problem is that neither of them emotionally matured in a healthy way. They both mentally fought and killed all their emotions for the marriage until there just was nothing left. The wife won't be worth anything without the husband. She married the right guy. He married the right girl. She won't miss him until he's dead and maybe she is just so emotionally screwed up that she won't even miss him then. They married the right people and then they and life broke them both because they didn't keep the child inside themselves alive. I'm not saying to be childish. But without keeping your childlike person alive there is really no point to staying alive unless it is a complete sacrifice for your children's future. And even then, is this the example you want to set for your kids? Do you want their lives as miserable as yours has been? Parents all over the world are always giving the message, "Do what I say not what I do." However, what children receive and pattern after often is a close to perfect emulation of their parents. Oh, they may eliminate the obvious parts that they didn't like but generally children mimic their parents both as children and as adults.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Write about your experiences of your universe

I don't know about you but often when I have tried to read old spiritual books from 2000+ years ago both the Old and New Testament or Scriptures in Sanskrit or hindi or whatever, often I just feel confused by what I read. I think it is because what happened 2000 to 10,000 years ago isn't relevant enough to make a whole lot of sense to me. And then when I consider how people talk about even the 1960s that I actually lived through, most people who were born after that miss the whole point of it all completely. Because you had to be there to understand the complete angst of the moment to understand what was really happening then. So when you try to make sense of what people were trying to say 2000 years ago you are bound to miss about 98% of what was actually going on in people's real life experience then. Only if you were a time traveler and went back in time and learned the language, would you actually understand even 25% of what was happening back then.

So, because of this I think people should write their own experiences of the universe. They should write of God, if they believe in God. If they don't believe in God they should write about that. And they should get a blog going or website and they should publish what they believe on line. And one day some person or computer or something can synthesize everyone's experiences and maybe that will be what everyone tends to believe. I got this idea while reading many many native American descriptions of their creation stories. I noticed that each tribe's descriptions didn't make any more or any less sense than any religions creation stories on earth. So I had the novel idea that all creation stories are equally real in a cultural relativistic sense. There are some very ethnocentric nations on earth like, China, the United States, Russia, France, Japan and a few others that value their culture as superior to all others like Hitler did with Germany, and Stalin did with Russia. But the more ethnocentric a nation is the more likely it will make war upon its neighbors who have different notions of what reality is. So, I believe the more versions of the creation story the better. If all creation stories are equal then maybe war will end permanently on earth.

Though I was a writer and have written short stories since I was about 9 years old and my 4th grade teacher first read a story I wrote that she liked before the class. I have written journals and stories ever since. As I grew older I found that if I journaled and read what I had written, a few months or even a few years later that I would understand myself better during all the times of my life and be better able to comprehend who I really was. It was as if by combining all the selves I had been I was less lonely at all points of my life. Throughout ones lifetime one becomes about 100 or more different people. Most of these people one never intended to be but was forced by one's life experience or another to stand up and take care of business. Most of the time, "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans."

People I have met that forcefully live out all their plans in detail are usually alone at 40 and alone at 60 and sometimes even alone at 30. In order to share your life with someone you have to blend your life with someone. But I started by blending all my selves by reading all my ideas days, weeks, months and years after I wrote them. Sometimes what I write makes my cry. Sometimes it makes me laugh. But always it makes me think and be proud that I have always searched for the truth and kindness and wisdom in everything and everyone in my life including myself. And if you are a natural writer like me, then writing is like breathing. You have to do it to keep breathing and living because it is who you are. It has nothing to do with money. It is something you do like being a musician, or an artist or a writer or a sculptor or whatever it is that you do that makes your heart beat and keeps you alive and choosing each day to go on living even one more day.

The End of An Era 5-28-09

Or it could be called, "The Death of almost everything we are used to!"

These kinds of times have happened a lot in the last 120 years or so. So what all these times have in common is the end of one or more things people were used to for a long time.

Let me give some examples from history.

The invention of the Car, truck and plane would be most easily tied to the beginning of the 20th century(even though the automobile was invented in the early 1880s and even before that if you consider the steam train-steam tractor conversion on to land without rails. Imagine yourself in those days in the midwest with only stage coaches and trains for public travel and suddenly all these cars and trucks are making so much noise and smoke that your horse throws you and you break you hip from the fall. The older generation really hated horseless carriages at first because of all the noise and smoke and coughing that resulted.

The next big change was World War I. There was never a mechanized war like this before. Never had millions died like they did in world War I. There were 9.7 million military personnel deaths and about 6.8 million civilian deaths for a total of 16 million deaths. And on top of this 21 million people were wounded. This created so many ramifications for years after this, including the Great Depression, Hitler etc. All were long term consequences of World War I.

The Great Depression: This was the worst economic downturn since the Civil War for the United States and it was caused by World War I and under regulation of investors. Just like now the problem was under regulation of Banks and Bank like business institutions and instruments.

World War II. The primary causes of World War II(about 72 million deaths worldwide 47million of them civilians) grew out of World War I and the Great Depression and created a level of chaos never seen on earth before. The only large nation left standing intact after World War II was the United States. So, the United States was the biggest creditor on earth until the middle of the Viet Nam War when it began to become the biggest debtor nation because the Viet Nam War completely gutted American finances just like the Iraq and Afghanistan war has. Only this time it is worse.

The biggest recession that I can remember was caused by the Viet Nam War. The worst of it was 1981-2. Even though it was pretty bad in the late 1970s and didn't totally end until the mid 1980s. However, some people think the worst one was 1989 or 2002(take your choice). However, for me, 1981 and 2 were much worse.(mostly because I was a father of 3 and only 32 so I was trying to support 5 people).

And finally, our present mess which is now considered to be the longest recession since the Great Depression. Though I don't think it will be as bad as the Great Depression in one way, I do think psychologically for a people used to a very affluent culture it might be tougher on most than the Great Depression was on a much younger, tougher and used to being poor America.

In some ways I'm lucky because I wasn't born rich. So I completely remember living most of my life without it. This gives me a tremendous advantage no matter what happens as long as I can keep my health through it all. So, I would urge all of you that have the time to study what others did in extreme transition times like now. Because whether any of us like it or not, we are in a very extreme transition time worldwide. And there are sure to be a lot of very unhappy people who don't like change around the world. However, change is the only way for the human race to survive the next few hundred years here on earth.

Buddha was a Soul Traveler

Quite by accident one day I came upon the writings of Guatama Buddha and him talking about how many planets had civilizations upon them. Now, it is important to realize that the way he speaks is not really to use the word planet, because that might not have even been a concept in his time. However, he does use the word "Worlds" to describe almost countless "Worlds" with trillions and trillions of beings upon them. He mentions that it is important for aspiring Buddhas to somehow go to these "Worlds" to minister to those there and to teach them of compassion and kindness and right mindful wisdom. So it is expected of Buddhas of the thousands to millions or more of worlds just in our galaxy to be visited by Buddhas of Earth and for Buddhas from other worlds to come to earth and to minister here as well. I was pretty amazed when I read all this, especially because the way he talks about it is not the way we think about such things today. So in reading an English translation one must not only wade through the translation but the totally different way of thinking about this when he lived over 2500 years ago in India and Nepal.

A Very Powerful Protection Technique

Caution: If you use this technique you have to be willing to drop dead if your motivation and compassion for all life in the universe isn't clear or pure.

I was first taught this technique by my parents but found it present in all the major metaphysical systems I studied as an adult. The most powerful manifestation of this I found in Tibetan Buddhism. Even though this isn't usually taught to monks until they are 40 or more years old so they don't misuse it.

As an intuitive I can sense when one or more people are directing prayers or what I sometimes call malpractice of supernatural gifts against me or others. So, what I learned to do when I was 21 and was in danger of dying from this was to send it all back upon who ever sent the malpractice prayer or ill wishes. By surviving this unjust attack against me by confused extreme misinformed individuals I learned the hard way just how this works up close and personal.

As I studied different metaphysical systems from the Swami path to Christian mysticism to Native American Shamanism to Tibetan Buddhism with many masters in each path, I grew to better understand what happens. I suppose it is like learning to be a supernatural swordsman in the vein of Archangel Michael.

The basic premise comes from refusing to be the victim on any level and just raising your hands and saying something as easy as "I return this all back to you!". One then visualizes whatever that is being sent their way revisiting the sender and doing to the sender whatever the sender prayed and visualized. In this way if someone wishes harm to you or death to you then that is sent back to the sender to visit them first.

In this way you separate yourself from retaliation and karmic retribution and stay out of any vicious cycles of karma. This is very clean. Just whatever they sent they must experience first as if it was you. This many times makes the sender sick because that is what they wished on you or dead if that is what they wished on you. In this way you stay out of the fray karmicly. Whatever their problem is they have to deal with. And you must stay in a place of compassion for all life yet know you are not a victim of this supernatural attack.

This is very simple and easy and useful as long as you stay out of states of revenge in consciousness. You are simply defending your right to exist by sending back negative energy as if you held up a piece of metal while someone was shooting at you and then watched the bullets ricochet back against the sender. It is exactly like this.

However, the more powerfully you do this the more necessary it is to have compassion for all life everywhere in the universe. This is my personal experience the last 40 years of my life.

Are Galactic Time Guard Operatives All Psyborgs?

fiction? This is a spontaneous addition to the "Memories series of writings begun in 1980" Periodically, as I am inspired I add these segments on my blog page.

If after reading the following you want to know more about all this try the two above web locations for more on Arcane and other Galactic Time Guard Operatives.

The answer is both "yes" and "no" to whether or not All Galactic Time Guard operatives are psyborgs or not. It would be like saying that anyone who has or uses a computer or cell phone is a psyborg. If that is your definition of a psyborg then all Galactic Time Guard Operatives are Psyborgs. A psyborg is a combination of human and machine. But also by this definition anyone with metal in their body like artificial hip joints or knee joints or even metal teeth could be considered to be psyborgs.

However, it is important to note that Galactic Time Guard operatives have all been medically enhanced. The most relevant way they all have been enhanced (at least in regard to the ones that come to earth specifically) is that they all have Biocoms capable of communicating sort of like micro miniature cell phones so small they are built into the nervous system of the operative and run (most of the time) on the electricity inside a human body that already runs neurons, muscles, heart etc. Also, all Earth based Galactic Time Guard operatives have deep storage memory units in their molars, and they have Galactic computer, robotic, and android backup at all times. So if, for example, there is a physical, mental, or computer or hardware related breakdown of any kind, various kinds of medbots (medical robots) appear and either in real time where the uninitiated are watching(where the memories of the watchers or uninitiated are eventually wiped of that memory) or the operative is temporarily removed from normal earth time into a stasis(alternate version of time that humans ordinarily don't reside in) for repair.

Though it might be more useful to see this as science fiction it is also equally possible that this could exist already in the past, present and future of earth.

Galactic Time Guard


It might be more useful to see this as fiction than not.

Notification by media of the relationship between the Galactic Time Guard and Earth's residents, visitors and other interested parties of this galaxy and others.

The Galactic Time Guard recognizes Earth's Galactic legal right to it's two basic time lines with more coming within the next few hundred years. However, this notification is specific to the penalties for temporary deaths and temporary maiming of Galactic Time Guard operatives, whether they be United Nations sanctioned operatives of Earth or from other places and times throughout our galaxy or even others.

First of all, to be specific, only temporary deaths or temporary maiming of Galactic Time Guard operatives will be punishable by the perpetrator never having been born through time manipulation. We have found that many times this so confuses time lines that we are now using almost completely earth born operatives and allowing their home nations through the United Nations to address the problem of temporary dying and temporary maiming. Whether the Galactic Time Guard operative is from earth or not, he or she is brought back to life or restored to perfect health through a time manipulated copy of the Guardian or by preventing the death or maiming in the first place by taking the operative out of the harming time and space before any harm occurs. However, even if the operative is earth born, most of the time the perpetrator of this harm will then never have been born. The exception is made only when that perpetrator is the grandfather or grandmother or series of greats to someone important in earth's time line and the children of that person that need to be alive to reproduce has not been born yet. However, oftentimes, a genetic duplicate will be put in place of the offending ignorant person who perpetrated the harm in the first place.
All Galactic Time Guard operatives never stay dead always by this means. And all perpetrators of harm that can usefully be eliminated from Earth's time line will be.

In this way Earth's extinction and the extinction of all life upon it has been, is now and will always be prevented, at least for the next 100,000 years or so. Thank you for your attention. end quote

Author's note. Whenever I get something like this I like to write it down as it might be relevant to continuing human life on earth(or something like that). For the rest of you who don't believe in stuff like this, just enjoy it as good,fun science fiction.

2nd note: pardon the typo, I changed accomplished to prevented which was the original intention anyhow. It is my understanding that if the Galactic Time Guard exists, one of its major functions is to prevent planet killing wars and species extincting wars. Their purpose is to prevent interplanetary wars as well to alter time so when one species goes into another species territory, they go into a time when there was no civilization yet. Thousands of wars and planetary extinctions are prevented across the galaxy each year in this way.

The Listeners

There are millions (or more) listeners worldwide. Up until the 1960s (at least in the western world) listeners were very reticent about talking about their abilities because there was sort of still this almost(witch burning) attitude about anyone who had psychic abilities. So if you had any natural abilities most of the time it was better not to talk about it. And because of the general ignorance of the average person, the fact that all this is genetically related was lost on almost everyone but anthropologists and geneticists and some doctors who specialized in this kind of knowledge.

All being a "Listener" means is that you can "hear" or sense what individuals, think, or feel or what they are going to do next. It also can mean you can sense what groups are deciding to do next. However, with a lifetime of these kind of experiences behind me it is debatable whether this ability is more helpful or confusing at times.

Humans are funny creatures, so if they sense someone "hears" their intentions then it is likely they will try to do something else.

For example, I have been what I would call a "natural psychic" activist. What that means to me is that I advocate that everyone "Be all that they can naturally Be". I felt personally offended and horrified when I was growing up by people having to hide their natural abilities because they were scared to death anyone would find out.

So, along with women's liberation, men's liberation, and the various ethnic liberations
since the 1950s and 1960s, I have always advocated "Psychic" liberation so that the human race can reach it's full potential and thereby not go extinct.

I was watching tv this morning and saw a program called "The Listeners" being advertised. Though I don't know if it is good or bad or what, never the less, it inspired me to write this piece.

I began publicly to be a listener when I used to drive diesel trucks when I was in college from San Diego to the Los Angeles Flower markets. I would load up my truck and leave by about 4 pm and after unloading at the Los Angeles wholesale flower market that all florists then bought from in Los Angeles County, I would head home and arrive sometime between 10pm and midnight. This was one of the ways I worked myself through college.

While I was driving up to Los Angeles from San Diego I would often get bored because I'm an intelligent person so I would telepath with people in cars and vehicles around me. I would get various reactions then. Many less people actually believed in telepathy then in 1971 to 1973 so often when I started to have a telepathic conversation with people they would just think I was another voice in their mind and not a separate person and they would be comfortable with that. Then there would be another person that would believe in telepathy but be terrified of it. They would be upset that I was talking to them. So just like if someone walked up to them on the street I would realize they didn't want to talk and politely withdraw and walk away.
Then there was a third type of person that would be totally accepting of telepathy and say something like, "I'm busy thinking my own thoughts. I don't want to talk now."
And the last category were people like me that completely accepted these abilities and talked telepathically regularly while driving down the freeway comparing notes about what was happening in their lives. There is incredible strength that comes from sharing with like minded individuals, male or female.

Just like with people you might meet in a restaurant, on a bus or train, there is still a polite distance that one maintains even in telepathic communication. Also, every so often you might be communicating with someone who is basicaly crazy and so you politely excuse yourself from that communication if possible.

So, there are all sorts of conditions one can run into. By the way this isn't something I do now as an older person. I prefer now just to scan people all the time to see if they are safe to be around. And this is even more important while on the freeway or highway now than ever before because of the amount of people who are drunk, close to drunk, on legal or illegal substances or just very upset or confused. In fact, I find that the people who are just out of body because of relationship problems or money problems are even more of a threat on the highway than those on alcohol or drugs. I can't really explain why this is I just know that it is true.

So now, I first watch for if a car is weaving or driving funny. But often times the car is driving okay and I pick up "telepathically" a really distressed individual who
is in another vehicle that is actually much more potentially dangerous to other drivers on the road than someone who is weaving in and out of two or more lanes.

My usual response is to either drop way back some such a person or to pass them very quickly.

Also, since almost everyone is intelligent now to realize that telepathy is a real and natural thing that all animals and humans have always done, only the most ridiculous of people don't realize that telepathy is going on between ALL lifeforms on earth all the time. This is true of human to human, human to animal, animal to human, human to plant, animal to plant etc. etc. etc.

So, being a listener is just like listening to different radio stations since every form of life on earth is like it's own broadcasting radio or even tv station. All one has to do is to tune into that frequency and one understands what is happening.

However, I find it useful only to tune into most frequencies of beings when I sense something isn't quite right. Then I can be prepared for anything before it happens.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Toe first or Heel First?

Before civilization, the primary way humans walked was toe first. Or more specifically one put their ball of their foot (which includes the toes) to the ground first. This is called the hunter's walk or the stealth walk. In fact this way of walking is still found in much of the non-western world still. For a human body is actually better served by walking ball and toe first rather than heel to the ground first.

It is my present belief that sometime before the Roman Empire, soldiers used marching and stomping their heels to the ground in unison, on cobblestones, rocks, whatever to intimidate and scare into submission their enemies and their families. Then young boys and men copied this soldiering behavior and so some women did too. In this way they had to only fight and kill the most macho and fearless self selected few men in any group. Just their marching while stomping their heels to the ground often made the ground shake as they came near. You can imagine the fear of the uneducated and superstitious masses.

However, though marching heel first and stomping ones heels into the ground might save lives in a war or battle, it is harmful long term on the heels and Achilles tendons of whoever is doing this long term. Likewise, walking on ones heels first is really only a second choice for long term foot health.

So, whenever I can now if I'm out alone on the trails I walk toes first if I am completely alone with my dogs who don't really care how I walk.

Recently, I got a bursa on my lower heel which is affecting my Achilles tendon of my right foot and has been causing me a lot of pain the last three months. To make matters worse any operations for this kind of thing is usually unsuccessful. So my only real useful choice is to walk less and to wear 3/4" gel cups in the heel of my shoes and to use anti inflammatory creams on my heel to keep the swelling down.

I'm 61, I have surfed, skied, built homes walked 20 to 50 miles while camping within a few days for years now, so I'm paying the price for a very active lifestyle now. However, I also know that there are some people who can sit still and never do anything and live to 100. I'm not one of those. So I feel very threatened by not being able to walk 2 to 4 miles a day with my dogs through the woods and it is taking its toll on my physical and psychological health. Now, the bursa is about 97% better than it was. But at its worst it was excruciatingly painful just to stand up out of bed. Sometimes, I thought I was going to faint from the pain it was so bad. So I would wake up in the night to take a leak and forget because I was dreaming that my foot was going to hurt and wake up when I put my foot on the ground to unbelievable pain.

However, after 3 months of being very careful and keeping walking to a minimum I have reduced the pain by 95%. But still, if I walk a couple of miles it comes back and I have to rest a while to reduce the swelling and the pain.

I'm not one to use pain killers because they only tend to reduce ones life span and mental and physical ability anyway. So unless I'm dying I tend not to use any painkillers as long as I can still sleep at night. If the pain is so bad I can't sleep then I'll use some sort of painkiller because none of us can sustain a healthy immune system if we can't sleep.

So, to not get into the state I'm in when you are old try walking ball and toes to the ground first to protect your heels from bursas as long as you feel safe doing so. Because some people think that people who walk like this are trying to sneak up on them and do mischief. So the hunter and stealth walk is best when you are alone in your home or out on a trail alone away from other people.

You've heard people say, "My bursitis is killing me." This is what they are talking about.

Some of the best realizations come during hard times

When things are financially easy in life one is not stressed and can easily get into non-useful ruts both in actions and in one's thoughts and emotions. During the economic crisis times the world is experiencing now, one is forcibly moved out of old ruts. One can get really upset and confused during these times. However, with all the changes comes an incredible opportunity to learn, to grow, to change, because one has to. There just isn't another choice to survive than to change. And change doesn't have to be all bad. Usually it is both bad and good.

To focus your mind and intentions on possible good outcomes internalize the following saying, "There are no problems, only opportunities!"

By making yourself see all problems as opportunities one maximizes one's future outcome into positive directions.

Some Hope in Housing Market

begin quote from above webpage.
U.S. Economy: Home Resales Rise on Drop in Prices (Update1)
Share | Email | Print | A A A

By Bob Willis

May 27 (Bloomberg) -- Home resales in the U.S. rose for the second time in three months in April as foreclosure auctions and cheaper prices spurred bargain hunters, buttressing the case for an end to the industry’s slump this year.

Purchases increased 2.9 percent to an annual rate of 4.68 million, in line with forecasts, from 4.55 million in March, National Association of Realtors figures showed in Washington. The median price slumped 15 percent from a year earlier, the second-biggest drop on record. A separate report indicated that the slump in home values eased in the first quarter.

“There is some bottom-fishing going on,” said Ethan Harris, co-head of U.S. economic research at Barclays Capital Inc. in New York. Still, “we have a ways to go in the housing recession.”

A pick-up in sales will help trim the glut of unsold homes and eventually stem the slump in property values. That will be critical to shoring up household finances and spurring a recovery in residential construction, helping the economy emerge from its deepest recession in half a century. end quote

I have also researched from other reports how it is expected that the average home in the U.S. will lose another 10% to 15% in value in the next year. This combined with the Chrysler and GM bankruptcy will likely mean a less volatile year looking forward than we have already seen in the last 12 months. However, this will also mean more job losses which will mean higher unemployment figures nationwide. And what happens when Unemployment compensation runs out? What do people do with nowhere left to turn? Do they get resourceful and innovative and creative or do they turn to begging or crime to survive? All these questions have to be asked and answered on an individual basis. However, all of us will live with the consequences of all these millions of individual decisions nationwide and worldwide.

Crushed by the Weight

I'm okay financially. But many people I know are not. The main toll of the past year is less financial than emotional. Father-in-law, mother, aunt, and cousin of mine gone since last year. I meet friends and relatives and almost everyone is emotionally struggling to find balance in these times. We all know people whose lives have been torn apart in one way or another in the past year. Yes. We will get through all of this(at least those of us who eventually survive all this.

I titled this article "Crushed by the Weight" because this is how most people feel right now, including me.

I friend of mine was dropping off his granddaughter at his daughter's in Bakersfield. In the next 15 minutes while driving home to the California coast from inland Bakersfield he witnessed a girl about 13 years old while she was pushing her bicycle across an intersection. The drunk lady ran a red light and mowed the girl and her bicycle down and drug her lifeless body under the car about 150 yards. There wasn't much left of the girl after this under the car. My friend is a retired Navy Fire Chief and so was the first first responder to reach the vehicle. When he reached the car the driver was throwing up.

But the carnage seems to have given my friend mild post traumatic stress disorder. He can't seem to stop the association of his granddaughter and the dead bicyclist. He said he slept 30 hours this past weekend and kept telling people he would be there but then just falling asleep. I told him this was temporary post traumatic stress and hopefully it would pass soon. But one never really knows about this sort of thing.

My son and his wife were walking a mountain trail a week after getting married right next to their university in southern California when someone shot at them about 4 times. When they reported it to the police the police said that this particular mountain canyon and trail had been known for drug deals and prostitution for about 40 years. How were they to know this ahead of time? They too, experienced later post traumatic stress disorder and had trouble sleeping regularly for over a month and finally both decided to withdraw from the university for one quarter.

Life can be emotionally and unexpectedly troubling at times for all of us. Most of the times these troubles pass and we can eventually resume our lives almost as good as new. However, "NO one gets out of here alive." Accepting our mortality sometimes is the beginning of our immortality here on earth.

I write mostly for those as of yet unborn. I write to try to give hope and a future for those who are still coming up in the world. You all are the hope of the future.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Paint flat roofs white to save energy

With the melting of not only the North pole by 2013 but the melting of most or all glaciers on earth by the same time more white reflective surfaces are needed to reflect the suns heating rays back up into space like ice and glaciers do. So U.S. Energy Secretary Steven Chu spoke of painting flats roofs white and finding ways to make the world's highways lighter more reflective colors to reflect back the suns heat and thereby reduce Global warming.

When we lose all or most ice from earth during late summers and early fall in the northern hemisphere one of the ways to replace the reflective quality of white ice glaciers and icebergs is to paint flat roof white and to make new roads lighter colors.

However, this might be counterproductive during the winter months during snowy icy times. During these times the black asphalt surfaces help to melt snow and ice and to store heat from any sun that hits them.

Energy Secretary Stephen Chu says:
Begin quote.""The industrial revolution was a revolution in the use of energy. It offloaded from human and animal power into using fossil fuels.

"We have to go to a different new revolution that can severely decrease the amount of carbon emissions in the generation of energy." end quote

So there are both active and passive ways to do this. The active ways I can think of are for example, solar cell arrays and wind and wave and geothermal generation of electrical power. And now, the passive ways of reducing earth heating up is to reflect back into space the suns heat using lighter colored highways worldwide and finding ways to make flat roofs be white or lighter colored or even reflective of the suns rays.

More Cuts for California

begin quote:
SACRAMENTO, Calif. – Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger on Tuesday proposed eliminating welfare for 500,000 families and terminating health coverage for nearly 1 million children to help close the state's ballooning budget deficit.

The Republican governor's administration released details of $5.5 billion in cuts, a week after state voters defeated special election ballot measures. The new proposals are on top of those previously announced by Schwarzenegger.

Also among the cuts are stops to college fee assistance for thousands of students, fewer vocational training opportunities for state inmates and the elimination of $70 million in funds for the state park system.

The state is trying to close a $21 billion deficit, although the Schwarzenegger administration said Tuesday that its proposed budget for the 2009-10 fiscal year was outdated. The governor's finance team said the deficit now was projected to grow to $24.3 billion through June 2010.
end quote.

Whether this can be done without throwing the state into Chaos or not I don't know. I'm sure it will throw the 500,000 families out of their homes and apartments out on the street, however, that will lose their welfare monthly payments. In this sense this is really bad for the 500,000 families. Hopefully, it doesn't turn too many to crime out of panic and desperation not to be homeless and even more vulnerable than they already are.

Stops to College fee assistance for many might be the end for now of their dreams of college or just a reason for another part time job or a reason to ask grandparents or uncles or Aunts for a little financial assistance with college or even to look more closely for available scholarships.

As to the 70 million dollars taken out of the state parks system, likely that will mean there are less docents and rangers at every state park. It also might mean that state park lands would be more vulnerable to deer, raccoon, bear and mountain lion poachers and for young people who are arsonists and vandals .

However, the biggest problem is likely to be the 1/3 of the state inmates from prison that will likely be released into the general populace.

A Zen type of Story

The father had not seen his son for some time and they were getting together so he could meet the mother of his new bride. Later when everyone had left but the father and the son in front of a blazing fireplace the father asked the son a question out of the blue. The question was, "Do you think you or I could be Maitreya Buddha?" The father asked the question just to see his sons reaction more than anything else. The son said, "It doesn't matter." As the father's mind exploded in the realizations it brought he was very happy. He thought "What an amazing son I have that can spontaneously say something so zen and yet so true. And not only that his answer exploded my mind and brought me many realizations." As the realizations progressed the father was taken to his understanding of heart cells. It is said that a new and different heart cell leads the heartbeat in every heart every time. Since a Buddha enlightens naturally often through a quick or spontaneous arising from voidness which could either be caused by anything or a completely independent arising, literally all sincere beings on the path are potential Maitreya Buddhas and which one actually arises to do the final job is completely irrelevant. The important thing is that it happens when it is necessary and when it is most needed in perfect celestial spontaneous timing.

Are you your own best friend?

I heard a story about a very old Aikido Master who was on a train with his wife. A very big and drunk man in Japan got on board and started terrorizing everyone on the train. The old Aikido Master just walked right up to the man and said, "What's wrong?"

The drunk man was so taken aback by the old Aikido Master that it broke his resolve and he began to cry and to tell his sad story to the old Aikido master and his wife. By the end of their journey the Aikido master and his wife had sort of temporarily or permanently adopted the unruly man.

For the old Aikido master realized something no one else on the train had. The drunk man wasn't really at war with everyone on the train. He was at war with himself. By asking the unruly drunk man what was wrong the man began to cry and stopped terrorizing everyone.

Now this story might not work for every person that is drunk and terrorizing people but the Aikido master was very wise. He knew himself and was his own best friend and knew this drunk man was at war with himself and seriously needed some help. So he helped this man to stop hurting himself by hurting everyone else. He disarmed the man without ever striking a physical blow. And he helped the man to start once again to become his own best friend.

Because only if you are your own best friend are you NOT a danger to yourself and everyone else.

I'm telling this story because when I was a survivalist in the early 1980s, even though I didn't believe in guns at the time, still I had non-perishable food in buried 50 gallon drums and was capable of surviving with my family at that time without any outside help, water, or electricity for at least 30 to 90 days without any help from anyone. However, what I was still learning was to be my own best friend. This is not something that one learns overnight. But if one gets to really know oneself then one also knows everyone else in a much deeper way. And if you are your own best friend then you are on your way to becoming everyone's best friend whether they understand it now or not. The fact that you are is what is important to life.

If you are your own best friend then you are much less prone to delusional or paranoid situations and one begins to find people like this more at age 30 and beyond. Having survived to about 30 and likely having faced your own death one or more times by then one becomes much more philosophical about the whole thing.

And then from about age 50 on one learns if they are still alive and kicking that "Panic" is death. Moving quickly can still be okay but to fully panic will likely cause death in people over about 50. So, remaining calm no matter what the situation tends to keep one alive after 50.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Crisis spurs spike in 'suburban survivalists'

The last time survivalists showed up it was the early 1980s and unemployment was at 9.6% nationawide. Even I was living on my 2 1/2 acres in the woods near Mt. Shasta and preparing for U.S. economic collapse. However, then I didn't know one thing. It was that the world had a vested interest in the U.S. not economically collapsing from the money drain from the Viet Nam War. So it was amazing to me then that the world loaned the U.S. all the money it did then to keep going because they were more afraid of the Soviet Union and Communist China that they were of the U.S. So here we are today.

This time I think the problem is both worse and better. It's worse because the whole world is affected and not just the U.S. this time. However, it is better because our government nipped it in the bud before everything got too crazy like it did then.

However, the world may not return the the same level of success for about 10 years or possibly never because of ongoing global climate change and droughts and floods as a result. If the world succeeds now it will be in a whole new way than ever before

So, just like the early 1980s, today's survivalists are like the old ones I knew, they are just looking around at the world and they are scared by what they see. And as the economy gets better slowly and surely they will just store their AK-47s and assault rifles and put away their generators and just use their home bunkers for storage or the bunkers will be used for their teenage boys to take their girlfriends to for privacy.

That's what happened in the 1980s, and if things keep recovering that's what will happen again. So if things get better the survivalists will stop being so afraid and things will start again to return to normal just like before.

By the way there was a really funny movie made back then with Robin Williams called "The Survivors" made in 1983.

Prisoner of the State: The Book

Zhao Ziyang, the architect of modern Chinese Capitalism and modernization who fell from power in China by trying to prevent the massacre at Tiananmen square in China spent the last 16 years of his life after the 1989 Tiananmen democracy demonstrations and massacre under house arrest. Still he managed to smuggle out of China his book journal on cassette tapes by covering over musical cassettes with his verbal journal and penciling in lightly a number on each cassette through some of his friends and supporters. It is just now being printed in English and other languages for all to read. My source for this information is the latest Time magazine 5-28-09, on page 28 in an article by Adi Ignatius At the top of page 28 it says Tiananmen Ghosts.

Begin quote: At the end of his journal, Zhao concludes that China must become a parliamentary democracy to meet the challenges of the modern wrold---a remarkable observation from someone who spent his entire career in service to the Communist Party, And onethat might well provoke a debate on Chinas Internet discussion boards and in it's chat rooms. Zhao's ultimate aim was a strong economy, but he had become convinced that his goal was inextricably linked to the development of democracy. China's ability to avoid another tragedy like Tiananmen might depend on how quickly that comes about. end quote

Be self employed not an employee

All of you out there looking to be employed by someone else should consider working toward self employment. Self employment if you have the necessary skills for whatever you want to make money doing might be your best option.

For example, I was talking with a lady who is about 40 who has an MBA in Business. She said she wanted to start her own business. In the 1980s I was a member of Briarpatch, an honest business organization that sprang up from UC Berkeley in the 1970s. The whole point was to meet and discuss ways to benefit both oneself and the customer and the community in as honest a way as possible and still stay in business. Without some kind of business advantage of some sort, your business won't stay in business. You need some kind of niche that gives you the advantage and keeps you in business.

This niche might be your location. It might be that you know someone that will sell something to you cheaper than anyone else. It might be almost anything. But without some sort of niche advantage of some sort over the competition you won't be in business long.

Whatever business you are in will be constantly changing to respond to your customer's needs over time. If you don't adapt to your customers' real needs then you won't be in business.

So what I told this 40 year old woman with an MBA was that whatever she wanted to sell, she needed to talk to potential customers that weren't friends or relatives and to ask them what she would need for them to buy from her, either once in a while or exclusively. If this kind of research isn't done then what often happens is that some people set up a business that they have always wanted to start without any real customers and then are very surprised when no one is interested in what they are selling. However, if that person has invested 10,000 to 100,000 dollars then they just lost that much money because they didn't do the necessary research into their business model.

I was reading an article in the latest Time magazine May 25th 2009 about employment and it doesn't look very good for traditional employees. Most retirement plans and benefit plans are disappearing from most companies left and right. So, if all the reasons that you wanted to be someone's employee are leaving the business you wanted to be hired by then this is just one more reason to own your own business.

People often say to me: "Well. I don't have any money to start a business." Yes. That is what it appears to be true. But remember people like Steven Jobs and Bill Gates who basically started their businesses in their garage or even in their bedrooms at first.

If you have a great idea sometimes anything is possible. And even if your idea isn't on the scale of a Bill Gates or a Steven Jobs and the WOZ it still might make you 10,000 dollars a year to 100,000 dollars a year and you could then forget about working for anyone ever again.

The problem with staying an employee throughout your life, to me is the same problem to me as living with your parents all your life. You get so busy following orders that your mind gets too twisted to think for yourself. So unless you really need that kind of parental approval why not try at least part time with your own business even if you only work on it nights and weekends while working part time or even full time somewhere else. Most really great businesses started out in someone's bedroom, garage or small rented office or something like that. After all, you have to start somewhere.

When I started my first business as a contractor in my late 20s I learned I liked being self employed like my father and grandfather and uncle did. So even though I didn't stay a contractor, I owned several businesses between my late 20s until about age 45 during my last divorce. Owning businesses totally changed how I saw everything and freed my mind from many useless constraints and all the back biting I found working for other people. For me, the freedom to run my life and choose my own hours was much better than being ordered around by people who were only making money on my work and creativity. Why not make all the profits on your own work and ideas? When I started owning businesses my life got 1000 percent better. However, I noticed that most people are not well rounded enough to succeed at their own businesses until they are in their late 20s unless a relative like parent, uncle, brother or sister or friend has already done the groundwork. Then someone might succeed even in their early 20s as long as the basic rules are followed for running a business successfully. But it is very important to be very self disciplined and realistic about what you are doing or else the whole thing can collapse very easily. Any unrealistic fantasies can bring your business down. Practicality and creativity make a business work as long as you can maintain a realistic assessment of what is actually going on.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

My Path 5-24-09

When I was 4 years old we moved from Seattle to San Diego. My mother, her mother and I rode the train south in our own compartment. I wore a trenchcoat and had raggedy Ann and Andy doll and a
stuffed toy horse in my briefcase I carried along with comic books. If people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I was trained to tell them, "I want to be a gentleman." This was my Scottish grandmother's doing but I have found this way of thinking useful ever since. Because I have always been taught to be a wise gentleman throughout my life and to be strong and yet kind I have never had to go to jail even overnight like many of my friends over the years. I was taught to use my mind like a weapon rather than my fists or a knife or a gun(even though I was taught to be a crack shot with a rifle by the age of 8 or 9. I could hit almost anything at about 100 yards by then because my grandfather was always a hunter and because my Dad was also a crack shot with a rifle too).

When I turned 6 in April 1954 we moved to Tujunga in the foothills near Los Angeles. My parents were put in charge of a mystical Christian Church that believed in reincarnation and many of the mystical ideas found in India and shared some beliefs with Self Realization Fellowship founded by Paramahansa Yogananda in I belive 1914. He was one of the first successful Swamis in the United States and met many famous people including Luther Burbank then. We often ate at the successful vegetarian SRF restaurants in Hollywood and Encinitas, California(near San Diego) in the late 50s and early 1960s. My father had been a vegetarian since 1934 and my mother since 1936. My father was a vegetarian because of health reasons and had studied with Paul Bragg who had been a student of Bernard McFadden. Also, Paul Bragg was also Jack Lalane's teacher as well.(remember Jack Lalane's glamour stretchers?). Or now the late night informercials selling his fruit and vegetable juicers?

Anyway, my parents were put in charge of the Los Angeles Church of this religion that consisted then of about 750 to 1000 regular adherents in the Los Angeles County area and hundreds of other churches of this denomination worldwide. In the summers my father would play the part of John the Baptist in the "I am" Come Pageant, usually every summer in July or August in an amphitheatre in Mt. Shasta, California. This pageant is still put on once a year at this time today. My father was in it from about 1946 until about 1974 when he decided to do something else instead. My parents were in charge as lay ministers of this church from 1954 until 1960 when my mother's father died and she had a mini nervous breakdown because of it. I began working for my father starting in 1960 every summer as an electrician's helper and he and I worked for many famous Movie and TV directors and he met Greer Garson, Annette Funicello, Sandra Dee, Bud Abbott, and many other famous personalities from the mid 1950s until he moved to San Diego in 1969. I found that movie actors were very special people but directors and producers usually weren't as nice of people as actors. Whether the actors were always acting or not it is hard to say. But directors were very controlling and so were producers and could be very difficult to work with for trades people trying to please them.

As a child I wasn't very happy that my parents were either running the church or my Dad was always off being an electrical contractor. However, usually one day a week(saturday) we would often go up to the mountains for a hike on the Silver Moccasin trail near Twin Peaks in the Angeles National Forest or in winter go sledding or skiing in the same area or if it were a really warm day go to the beach and swim at Santa Monica, Malibu or Zuma Beaches.(I almost drowned at Zuma Beach before I could swim at age 8). However, by 9 or 10 I was a self instructed swimmer at the Verdugo Olympic sized swimming pool in MOntrose(near Glendale, California).

I learned slowly to visualize things like my parents taught me. If you want something in your life it helps to see the thing or person you want in your life. I was taught this in regard to prayer in order to go into a prayer fusion with God and to then manifest things. This kind of thing when scientifically analyzed is more like invoking things into your life that you want as you experience yourself at one with God. It is less about being like a little child and asking God for something. It is more about being an adult and one with God Consciousness and then making things happen. However, I learned as I grew up that this sort of stuff is very powerful and not to be trifled with. One must first be sure of having a good motivation before doing anything in this direction or else one can make ones life very difficult by accident.

The caution with all this would be: Be careful what you wish for because you may get it.

People wish for all sorts of things and only later realize they wished for the wrong thing. Some things, situations, people, that you might wish for are not in the end what you really want. So be very careful what you wish for because if you wish wrong it could result in the early end of your life.

However, the other point I would like to make is: nothing ventured nothing gained. This is one of the most important rules of life. If you don't make your life happen no one else will either!

Memorial Day
I saw this map above on CNN TV and wanted you all to be able to access it to better understand the fallen U.S. Troops and to read about them and to pray for them and their families and friends.

Since I'm not a Veteran because I had childhood epilepsy and sunstroke before I was of draftable age during the Viet Nam War there isn't a lot that I have to say that I think would be useful on the subject of Memorial Day.But, I can say that more young men my age died in Viet Nam than any other age. I'm now 61. So more men who would now be 61 if they hadn't died in Viet Nam are now dead my age from that than any other. 50,000 men died in the Viet Nam War and 250,000 were physically wounded. And countless others have been walking wounded ever since that you still see living on the streets of America. However, The above site will allow you to know what Americans died since 2002 in Iraq and Afghanistan, how they died, where they lived etc. In this way you can read about them and pray for them and their families.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Take a Loaded Gun to a Nat'l park part 2

Since I wrote the first article on this subject there are two more things I've learned so far. First, even if this new legislation that has been attached to the Credit Card Bill isn't passed one could take in guns into a national park they just had to be unloaded guns.

The second thing that might strangely be related to this is the problem in Sequoia National Park of Mexican marijuana growers with AK-47s and grenade launchers, rifles and pistols and grenades. Many national forest areas have been taken over by various marijuana growers, meth makers etc. and threatening or making people who are just hikers wandering into their growing or making illegal drugs just disappear. So this might just be another element that the National Rifle Association might be playing upon.

However, what do you get when you send people with loaded guns into National Parks? Answer: Dead people and dead animals. Pretty soon there just won't be ANY wild animals to see at all.(I don't think we are going to run out of people any time soon.)

Cheney and Pelosi

Though Cheney is trying to get people to not close Guantanamo, I don't really believe what he is saying is sincere. I believe he is a spokesman for the World Military Industrial complex. So anything that keeps the U.S. and other countries going bankrupt like we now are paying for expensive military hardware he is going to do. I believe that if he can keep Guantanamo open he can recruit terrorists to fight the Free world. As long as he can keep recruiting terrorists to fight us, his beloved Halliburton (that he was the CEO of before becoming vice-president) can continue to make money selling weaponry and military related services. Do I believe Cheney is sincere. NO. I don't. He is just looking to make money on a book and to make his Halliburton stocks go up higher, that's all. Keeping Guantanamo open is a way to make money for Daddy Warbucks(Cheney) that's all. Sincere? NO. MOney. That's all.

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi is the most powerful political woman in America. She is third in line to become president if anything happens to Obama and Biden. To compare Nancy Pelosi to PUssy Galore like the Republicans are doing should be treason if it isn't. Do we take seriously the chain of command or not? Just because she is a woman she is still the Speaker of the house and third in line for the presidency. If Americans don't like that they should change it otherwise they should respect the status quo.

California: Breaking up is hard to do

begin quote from above web article:
California: Breaking up is hard to do
California's budget problems are kind of like the boy who cried "wolf." Nobody pays attention anymore. Well, hardly anybody. A radical idea that would split California into four distinct states garnered some attention on the Buzz. Commenters chimed in with their thoughts. Some even suggested names including Calidormia (for the "bedroom communities and burbs all across the state") and Califarmia (for the huge agricultural regions). The commenter notes that Calinormia could make for a nice state, but, alas, normal doesn't exist out west. Experts argue that the proposal doesn't have a chance of working, but we say "never say never." This is the state the elected Conan the Destroyer, after all.
end quote.

Even though the above is obviously not written by a Californian I'm sure whatever Californian's do to survive this mess will be copied by other states. Just like our plan for emissions for motor vehicles in increasing mileage was adopted by 12 other states and now through Obama,the Federal Government. People always seem to underestimate Californians.

One fact people always forget: There are more millionaires living in California than ANY place else on earth. First of all, it's a great place to live! It has become sort of expensive on the coast so if you are not a millionaire it can be hard to live on the ocean unless you have owned the home multi-generationally. However, because of the wealth there is a very high degree of education and innovation. California breaths and lives and survives on innovation and always has. The comment about California not being normal would be viewed by Californians sort of like: "Yes. We agree we are not normal because normal is being backward and living in the stone age."

So, I guess the way Californians would view it quite honestly is that people who view us as not normal have a stagnant, not innovative way of looking at things. So, it is all a matter of perspective. So, it all depends upon what a group of people value. And that changes based upon the needs of physical, financial, and emotional survival. If people aren't innovative enough to survive these times then they won't.

That is the California attitude in a nutshell: Be daring enough to change in these times or be prepared not to make it at all!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Wall Street Brain Drain?"Brain-Drain"-Threat-Legit-as-Boutiques-Foreign-Firms-Rise

I was talking to my wife about this after listening to the web video about it. It reminds me of the story of the traveling salesman that knocks up the farmer's daughter and then leaves.

It is said in this yahoo finance piece that the highest paid were "risk takers" and I would say, "ultimate opportunists" financially. So, they are naturally going to go to the 'highest bidder' internationally after knocking up "Wall Street" and the American public's finances. Though the initial blame must go to whoever thought up subprime loans and credit default swaps there is enough blame to go around for everyone in world wide finance. I suppose it was all inevitable. If you educate financial risk takers with PHD's in economics eventually one of them is going to figure out a new way to
"game" the system. It's just inevitable. So about 70 years from now(or sooner) I wonder how the world economic system will get "screwed" then?

Thursday, May 21, 2009

What is the Truth? 5-21-09

Down through history the de facto truth that people operate with every day is the best information(or not) that people can obtain on a day to day basis. Hopefully, as the human race moves forward more truth is obtained that actually agrees with what is or what happened. However, many times, you and I sense the truth is nowhere to be found in many of the situations we encounter during our lives. At these times we just do the best that we can do. And hopefully that is what all our ancestors did too back thousands of years. Can more be expected of us than that?

Truth is Stranger Than Fiction

I seldom go to Trader Joe's with my wife to buy food. It is one of the healthiest and yet inexpensive place to buy good food around these days as long as you watch out for frozen things that don't get rotated much like quiche made with eggs which I got salmonella poisoning from from non rotation about 3 years ago in the summer.

However, as we were checking out my wife introduced me to the checker there and he said to me, "So you get to stay home and benefit from this woman's work?" And I said, "Yes. I'm retired and yes, 'truth is stranger than fiction'. To which my wife said, "Watch out. He's waxing philosophic. Is that a comment on marriage?" And I said, "NO. It's a comment on life. The checker said, "Then I'll see you again?" and I said, "Yes. Quite likely.

In life I have found that just when you get used to things being one way, they change. So if you cannot change then you will mentally or emotionally or physically die, one or all. I have been through many emotional deaths and quite a few mental deaths but so far I have managed to physically be alive since 1948 through about 100 or more slightly different Freds. At core, I'm still the kind young scientist and mystic that I was between 8 or 10 years old with a lot more experience and armor and enlightenment going on. So, the secret is somehow staying childlike enough so people still like and love you without becoming so childish or cold so that no one wants to know you anymore.

Take a loaded gun to a National Park?

Someone tacked on this legislation on to the credit card reform legislation working its way through congress right now and Obama might have no choice but to sign it the way it is.

So, as crazy as this sounds, it might be okay to defend yourself while hiking on National Park trails from people as long as you don't shoot any wildlife which is still protected.

So the insane motto here might be: "Shoot people not animals!"

UP until now only Forest Rangers were allowed to carry loaded weapons in National Parks. It has always been this way since I was a boy and before that. I was born in 1948.

Is California headed for Bankruptcy?

Sure looks that way to me. I wrote and article recently that people with school age children in California might be forced to home school or take their children's education into their own hands if they want their children to have a good future.

However, if the state does go bankrupt(I don't know of any state that has done this before in the U.S.) education might be the least of our worries.

We should be worried about police, firemen, state hospitals, state prisons, inmates and where they are going to go with no money to run the prisons etc.

California is the 8th largest economy in the world. The whole world will be seriously affected in ways never seen before if the state goes bankrupt.

And to think all this was caused originally by Enron and all the other energy companies that stole billions of dollars from our state's coffers because our state stepped in to prevent the gouging of billions from those who needed the electricity during Governor Davis' term. Sounds a lot like the subprime and credit default swaps doesn't it.

Will the subprime and credit default swaps bankrupt the U.S. the way crooked energy companies have possibly bankrupted California?
Will the other western states that were bilked by energy companies like Enron go bankrupt next. Time will tell.

The Future 5-20-09

It is my present belief that some time during President Obama's time as president(either 4 or 8 years) he will have to sanction or at least be neutral and allow Israel to prevent Iran from stockpiling nuclear missiles capable of reaching Israel.

However, I'm very concerned one of two things would result from this: either the end of Israel because of a withdrawing of support from many present allies of Israel or an all out nuclear war between Israel and Iran to the death of one or both nations and no one being able to live in either place for about 20,000 years. What that would do to not only Israel and Iran but the rest of the world would be hard to say at present.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Deja Vu 5-20-09

This is not from any religion. It is just my direct experience with it. Most of the time as a life long precognitive psychic, the experiences I get that tell me the potential future can come from dreams, visions, or looking into the future because I'm interested in what is coming or want to be safe when I drive, fly, or use any of the quick methods of transportation available on earth. I tend to be a little less cautious if I'm just walking some place but then again there are mountain lions sometimes I have run across where I live in the pine forests so even there one must be careful.

No. Deja Vu because it hits so suddenly even freaks me out sometimes, simply because it the emotional impact of remembering a dream when it happens in actuality one is never prepared for. I had such an experience recently. For me, one of the things about deja vu for me at least is the mind can play a trick on you with this type of thing and then you are left holding the bag sometimes, so deja vu isn't one of the things I tend to rely on. Whereas if I get a really strong feeling that something is going to happen, then I know I have at least a 80 to 100% chance of something happening unless I alter it to save my life or someone else's. I have always believed that this is a genetically passed down survival trait that helped tribes survive way before civilization even was thought of. So I have used it to keep myself and my family and my friends and even beyond that alive and safe most all of my life. Although sometimes, God comes in and makes it known to me that it's just some people's time to come home and that I shouldn't interfere. It is very important to listen to God when one is told this I have found. There just aren't any exceptions to this.

One of the most amazing Deja Vu experiences of my life was a dream I had when I was about 5 years old. In this dream there were a bunch of young people praying that had beards and long hair. I remember being 5 in 1953 and thinking, "No one has had beards and long hair like this since the late 1800s. What is this all about?"

However, this dream came true for me in 1971 or 2 in San Diego near Balboa Park. I had started attending a college experimental college course called "Universal Awareness". There were initially about 250 kids in the class that were mostly students from San Diego State University. Eventually about 20 of us decided to meet after the course ended at someone's house near Balboa Park and continue our studies there. We were exploring seeing aura's, prayer, yoga, and astral projection and stuff like this. Only it wasn't theoretical, we were actually doing it. Most people I had talked to about this kind of stuff were only theoretical so I was kind of amazed to be with a group who were actually joining together to actually make all this happen. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. The first time I ever could read an aura was there and the first conscious experience of soul traveling was also associated with this group of college students. We also became good friends for the 6 months or 1 year that we met together every Friday night to practice becoming more evolved spiritually as people both individually and collectively. This was my most pivotal deja vu experience in my life that I dreamed at age 5 in 1953 but didn't happen until 1971 when I was about 23 in San Diego, California.

So, that brings me to today. A very old friend who once saved my life when I was 21 who is probably the most accurate spiritual psychic I have ever met(though others are very close in clarity to her) is now in her 80s. She like me, is very sensitive to earthquakes(we both get irritated when one is coming and sometimes nauseus). We are very connected to earth and all life that lives here. So when the 4.9 earthquake went off a few days ago and then when another earthquake at 4.1 hit yesterday, she kept saying she didn't think this was over. She also said that all her psychic friends, including me that she calls "her circle of lights" are telling her the same thing, that something very ominous is coming. That doesn't mean to me that it is an earthquake but it means something is definitely going on.

Now for me, at this point it is hard for me to separate the people of the world who feel they are falling through space with no ground or that the rug has been pulled out from under them from the distress I feel from all the plants and animals and creatures all over earth. I experience this distress sort of like two notes of the same musical cord. It is sort of like a moaning kind of feeling of all life on earth being in distress. However, on top of all this there is something that feels to me a little like what it feels to be punched in the stomach and that is what I can't seem to put my finger on in defining this. It isn't the feeling of being hit in the stomach. It is the feeling of what it feels like to have been hit in the stomach and be healing up from that the next 4 days. That's what I can't seem to define right. So I'm thinking it could be anything from too much cell phone communications going through everyone's body or coming earthquakes or just the earth being pissed off with too many people alive on it. But I still try to figure out exactly what I'm experiencing because it is definitely different than anything I've experienced before.

So, all this is leading up to my latest Deja Vu. But let me give you a caveat. I don't fully trust deja vu's because of the mind trick factor. So I'm discounting this to about 50-50 whether this actually might happen at all.

I was walking into my bedroom and talking to my wife and it triggered a deja vu memory and I said, "I'm having a deja vu." Now, my wife is used to me sensing things before they happen so she has gotten used to it over the last 15 years. However, I didn't want to tell her how this one ended. I finally told her and my son how this deja vu ended with the ceiling of our house coming down on top of me and the walls blown out. The only explanation for me that made any sense is an earthquake. I suppose another explanation could be a plane crash but other than these two things nothing makes any sense to me at all. So right here I'm telling you I don't think this is going to happen and yet it has all the signs of a deja vu. Obviously, if it is an earthquake since I live where there is bedrock and not sand, in order for it to do that to my house we would net an earthquake close to 8.0 or over that. We haven't had anything that big in my lifetime in California and the only quake that big or bigger in the U.S. was in Alaska in 1964, I believe and devastated Anchorage, Alaska. Then the tsunami's wiped out many coastal fishing villages and killed a whole lot of people.

So, like I said, I don't believe it could really happen but then again, I have had deja vu's that have come true almost 20 years later after I dreamed them.

eclipses in 2012

My son was telling me that there will be 3 eclipses in 2012. The first two eclipses will be of the normal variety that we usually have on earth. However, he said the third eclipse is not a solar and not a lunar eclipse but a Galactic Eclipse. I'm not entirely sure I'm clear on what that even means. However, what he did say was that since this is a once in every 26,000 year event we might be exposed to a gamma burst from the Galactic Core's Black Hole that holds the galaxy together. Scientists are worried about this he said, as no one was alive(that we know of) that experienced the last 26,000 year event to find out if they were exposed to a gamma burst from the Galactic Core Black hole then.

The following is my personal speculation: Since I can't seem to easily find references so far about the 3 eclipses in 2012 it is my thought that this information might be being repressed by world governments who remember y2k quite well and all the panic over that even though people found ways around it so it didn't really happen. There is also the theory that because at least 7 people died when Orson Wells read an excerpt from H.G. Wells on Halloween night around 1940 thinking the world was really being invaded by another planet, that the government suppressed UFO information from the general public from 1940 onward to the present to avoid mass panic and deaths like in 1940. So it makes sense to me because of the panic issue that most credible information might be suppressed until the week of the potential event and might even be suppressed then. However, with a large enough gamma burst all life on earth might end, even if people were underground when it occurred. However, this all sounds a little too much like a Star Trek TV episode for me to entirely believe it.

However, I was able to find this one site on related information easily.

begin quote from included website

The date December 21st, 2012 A.D. ( in the Long Count), represents an extremely close conjunction of the Winter Solstice Sun with the crossing point of the Galactic Equator (Equator of the Milky Way) and the Ecliptic (path of the Sun), what that ancient Maya recognized as the Sacred Tree. This is an event that has been coming to
resonance very slowly over thousands and thousands of years. It will come to resolution at exactly 11:11 am GMT.

On the winter solstice of 2012, the noonday Sun exactly conjuncts
the crossing point of the sun's ecliptic with the galactic plane,
while also closely conjuncting the exact the center of the galaxy.
end quote

I was, however, able to find an annular solar eclipse on May 20th, 2012 at the following site that tracks all eclipses:

Also, at the NASA site it says something about the transit of Venus during that year as well.

Also, there will be a total solar eclipse near New Zealand on November 13th 2012 also according to this NASA site.

So, to name all the dates and the types I found available for 2012. They are:

Solar eclipse May 20th 2012
lunar eclipse June 4th 2012
solar eclipse Nov. 13th 2012
lunar eclipse Nov. 28th 2012

I looked for an average number of eclipses both solar and lunar and they seems to range between about 4 to 6 eclipses per year.

I liked this more scientific yet fun approach to the problem with some cool pictures at the following website:

In the following quote he is referring to the Galactic Eclipse.
quote from startswithabang website above:
As best as we can tell, this perfect alignment happens rarely, about once every 31 million years. And it happens, this time, to occur sometime between the years 1983 and 2018. (The picture above is someone’s estimate, not an actual picture.) It’s a very neat and very rare astronomical event, and it’s really neat that it’s happening during our lifetimes! It’s a little unfortunate that even with our best measurements, this 35-year range is the best we can narrow it down to.

Other than it being neat, however, what’s its significance?

That’s right: absolutely nothing. If nothing happens slightly below the center of the galactic disc or slightly above the center of the galactic disc, why should anything special happen in the direct center of it? There’s nothing special about its magnetic fields, its gravitational fields, its density, or any other property we can even fathom. It’s not even a doomsday scenario, because there isn’t even a possible physical explanation of anything that could happen.

This is not the first time I’ve read something contending that the world is going to end in 2012. So be afraid if you like. Buy your duct tape and stock up on your canned goods. But don’t fear the galactic eclipse; you’re better off going out and watching for it! end quote.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

The Strangeness of Now5-19-09

Not since visiting India and Nepal and meeting people way out in the country away from most civilization or the few times I have lived very remotely in the mountains of Northern California or stayed fasting when I was young in the desert in a cabin away from people have I experienced what I have been lately.

The easiest way I can explain it is to take you back with me to India in 1985 and 6. All the basic rules of travel that one expects in the United states and Europe only existed in India and Nepal if one was flying in a commercial jet or renting a car with a driver. And even renting a car with a driver was different than anyplace on earth I have been in some ways.

Here in the U.S. we usually expect (unless we are homeless)planes,trains, and buses to be on time and if we buy a seat on one we expect it to be there somewhere on that plane, train or bus, even if it isn't always where we expected on the vehicle. However, in 1985 and 6 India this wasn't true necessarily for buses and trains.

I was excited when I bought our first train tickets to the nearest city in India to us for my family of 5. However, when the train came I realized that the only way to ride this train was to hang onto the outside of it, and though I at the time could have without our baggage, my family could not. So I watched the train pull into the station as all our hearts sank as we didn't have a place to stay yet and it was now dark. My wife and I and our kids then 11, 12, and 14 were upset we didn't get to ride on the steam train that night. we finally gave up and got a room for the night and decided to figure something out the next day. The next day we bought bus tickets for the next big town because at least then we actually would have seats.(Later we learned that families usually rent a whole compartment which is what we did on the next train we rode on. Also, we learned that one had to use ticket scalpers who bought and sold tickets professionally to sell to wealthy travelers who wanted to travel today or tomorrow and all the poorer people just held onto the outside of the train and usually survived it without being maimed or killed.(However, most of these are young men between about 12 years old and 30 to 35). Families don't travel this way.

So riding on the outside of a train was done regularly then and was an act of bravado for young men only.

The other thing I ran into around the 50% to 60% that hadn't gone to school very little or at all(there were no public schools in India then) was a very strong spiritual belief system. This system the based there very lives upon so if they lived it was God's will and if they died it was God's will. But somehow this system once I understood it actually worked better than our more scientific system here in America. And now that the poorest 50% of America is living in some kind of alternate hell from losing their jobs, homes, families, and with so many more going homeless every day I believe you are going to see some of the things similar to what I saw in India. When logic and science and government fails people they have to fend for themselves. And one of the ways to do this is to develop their own survival systems like people have in other parts of the world which might have mostly nothing to do with what we now call science.

After all, you can't eat science. Science won't comfort your children if they are starving. Science in the end is a very cold set of rules of the universe, that in the end might be completely useless in helping individuals and families to survive.

It is sort of like if a person is stuck with their car broken down out in the wilderness. Without gas and someone to drive the car it is meaningless. Whereas anyplace that keeps a person out of the rain and safe might be useful to a homeless person.

So when people have nothing, the most valuable thing they have left is their friends and relatives who might help them and God and angels or whatever higher beings they might believe in.

When someone is starving and might go crazy or die from everything going on in their lives they have to have some real or imagined system to turn to.

I have always said that people have to do whatever works in their lives as long as it is a kind system of beliefs.

So, in these times, even in America it is very important to give even homeless people respect even if you didn't give them respect before. This doesn't mean that you should let them take advantage of you, it just means that to not give someone respect who needs it might be dangerous these days here in America(the U.S.)

So, one should expect the belief systems of the poorest 50% of the population even in western nations to start to perceive things very differently than they have up until now.

The people of all classes of the economic spectrum who have been failed by the world economic system, often through no fault of their own, will now be looking for another way, another system to make their lives work and bring meaning to their lives. Because of this, the world 20 years from now might look nothing like the last century at all but like something very different both good and bad. They will be looking for a better economic system but also maybe another spiritual and philosophy of life that serves both they and their families and friends better than the systems that have failed them and their families and their friends. It is inevitable that many changes on earth will come directly from systemic failure by governments and economic systems. I hope this will come as safely as possible for everyone.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Senile Dementia

I'm not a doctor of any kind. However, because my mother was diagnosed with Senile dementia and I watched her changes for 7to8 years until she died from it, the first thing you need to know is that both senile dementia and alzheimers are in the end fatal. There is no recovery from either of these diseases. Though less is known about alzheimers, a lot is known about senile dementia. First of all it is hardening of the arteries of the brain. One of the ways to prevent the symptoms of Senile dementia is regular B-12 shots past about age 50. The problem is that many people over 50 can't process B-12 vitamins or any B-vitamins in their stomachs. Since the brain cannot remain rational without B-12 many people start to lose it mentally as a result if they don't get enough B-12. If your stomach can't any longer process B-12 then there are only two ways to get it: one through sub lingual B-12's under the tongue that are taken directly into the bloodstream through salts under the tongue or by a B-12 injection at your doctors.

Also, many things can mimic senile dementia symptoms like strong antibiotics given to someone after their late 70s for example, or drugs that reduce sodium in the blood to the point where one goes into temporary dementia from low sodium. another way to artificially go into dementia is too much salt in the diet. When sodium is either raised or lowered to a normal level a person usually gets better.

However, when someone loses it sometimes there doesn't seem to be a way of going back to normal and then this is senile dementia. Often a person can remember their childhood but can't remember their children, spouses or friends eventually. However, if it is senile dementia the first symptoms can usually be diagnosed if a person gets transfer trauma. For example, in 1999 I took my mother to Scotland, England and Europe. My mother, I expected to be her normal harmonious happy person, but no she was the most difficult person on the trip even though I was traveling also with my 10 year old daughter. My normally happy harmonious mother was very unusually difficult especially after we landed in Germany. When I rented a motorhome once she got into it she wouldn't ever come out of it through Germany, Austria, Switzerland or Italy until I eventually drove it back to Munich, Germany to return it to where I rented it and flew to England. I couldn't believe how strange my mother got. However, now I know(10 years later) that she was evidencing "Transfer trauma" or the inability to cope with new surroundings which is an early symptom of "Senile Dementia".

Within the next two years my mother totally began to lose it and was unsafe to let live in her apartment anymore after she almost burned it down by placing a plastic tupperware bowl on the electric stove and watching it burn while she prayed for it to stop burning for 24 hours. When my son saw this(He was about 25 then) he realized that she could no longer live unsupervised. Within 3 months we had no choice but to institutionalize her for her safety and for ours.

Though this was awful for the whole family we saw no other way to protect her from herself and to protect the rest of the family from her actions.

I'm sharing this with you because I'm finding more and more people having to deal with either senile dementia or alzheimers in their elderly relatives.

The single most important thing I can say to you is that when they start to go, especially the men they might become dangerous and need someone stronger than they to subdue them in an emergency if they are harming themselves or someone else. This person might have been your hero all your life but once they go they are no longer the same person you know and might be capable of almost anything at anytime whether you are awake or asleep. So it is important to realize this before they harm themselves or someone else. Once someone goes over into senile dementia or alzheimers anything can happen and sometimes does. Just remember that they are no longer the person you knew, they are only the body you knew. This is really an important distinction so that you can remain rational dealing with them and protecting yourself and them in any emergency that arises. Dealing with my mother's situation from 1999 in Europe until she died last fall 2008 was the single worst and most difficult thing I ever had to deal with. The hardest thing is to stay rational through all this while you permanently lose a loved one but their body is still alive. It's enough to make anyone temporarily crazy from the slow loss. So keep rational through it all for everyone's sake, especially the rest of your family and friends who are still alive and okay.