Thursday, April 15, 2010

Seeing God is like being Struck by Lightning

I was trying to express what my first experience of seeing God was like. Here are some examples of my first real life experience: If you want to see God it is like wanting to be struck by lightning, because you will never be the same again. To actually see God one is not the same person anymore even if they survive it with their physical body still alive and intact.

My first real experience with God happened in a really odd situation that hopefully most of you don't have to experience. I had broken up with the girl I had intended to marry and had planned the next 20 plus years of my life around and after that had been excommunicated from the church I was born into. Both these events made me consider suicide.  So one day I said to God, "If you don't show yourself to me in the next week I will kill myself." And I meant exactly what I said.

A couple of days later I found myself in a place like the Orion Nebula. I don't know how I got there I was just there and God came up to me and said, "You're taking all this way too serious. There are really only two sins in the universe, One is to take life too seriously and the other is not to take life seriously enough."
  This being   was not physical or human but appeared to me in an energy form so I could see the being but knew this being was not human or physical like any human or animal or anything like I had ever seen before. I asked this being if He was God. He said, "I created your soul." At the time this meant that this being was God to me."

So God said, "If you harm any being or beings anywhere it is like cutting off your own fingers or mine. So you need to not harm any being. They are all your relatives throughout the universe."

Though God said much more to me what he had said shook me to the core. I found myself physically shaking at times for the next few days. Then I felt very ashamed that I ever considered suicide because I finally understood what God was and what God was was not what I had thought before. What God Thought about who you and I and everyone was and our place in the universe was not as I had thought at all before. So after I got done shaking for a few days I found myself wandering the trails in the forests and along the beaches of the San Diego area near where I lived then. After about three weeks of getting used to how God had changed me I found I could start to have useful conversations with people again. My whole life had changed now that God had spoken to me. But I was not the same person anymore because how I saw myself and everyone and everything in the universe had permanently changed. I had seen God and been reborn as someone new.

One of the descriptions I most like of what this felt like for me was that I felt and sometimes still feel like a Redwood Tree or Sequioa Redwood tree. Often these hundreds or thousands of year old trees have been burned but because Redwoods are designed to survive fires often they are hollowed out by fires but still alive. So one can stand inside the tree where it is all charred and it can be raining out but the tree keeps one dry even though it has been in one or more fires and has lived hundreds or thousands of years. What I have felt like since I saw God is like one of these still alive but burned out trees. So, Yes! You can see God but then you will be someone else after that because who you were will have died.

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