Grateful to my Son

I am grateful to my son for being there when I found out my best from from 12 to 21 when he went off to  the Viet Nam War and I didn't find him again until the 1990s died a few weeks ago. I now have exactly one person that I'm still close to (my cousin) who still knows me from that time (1960 to 1969), so for me it is a very grate loss to lose one of the two people that I still know and associate with from that time in my life here today in 2011.

That morning when we found out we were planning a trip to Arizona. What is strange is that a few months before we were also just heading out to Death Valley National Park when I found that my friend had been severely abused by his wife and had been put in state custody in a home for Alzheimer's patients last June. It was his sister calling to tell me that she had gotten custody of Mike and put him in a Alzheimer's facility in Bakersfield. But the morning in Victorville as we planned to leave that day for Arizona on a road trip I found out what had happened and that he was now in Bakersfield. He had asked for my help in 2005 and so I had tried to help him separate from his wife but he even then didn't know what hist wallet was. So within 2 days he wanted to go back to his wife and I said, "Mike. If I take you back there you will never see me again! I can't watch her kill you." Mike sadly nodded and walked to his home and I never saw him alive again. But I had no legal authority to do anything in that situation. I told his sister there was nothing I could do and maybe she could but legally his wife who was abusing him because she was an alcoholic and incapable of rational thought was going to kill him. I knew it and I couldn't watch it happen. There is only so much you can do as a friend legally in that situation.

So, when Mike's sister called once again it all flooded back upon me, the complete unfairness of life and the suffering of my friend who was always the most loyal and trusted friend of mine in this lifetime. How can good people be just so incredibly mistreated? Once again if we don't take things into our hands and have control of our lives we WILL be victims of someone. That is a given from everything I have seen in life. Take your life and live it and end it when it is time on your own terms. Don't make crazy or unfit people gain karma by causing you harm. Be responsible for yourself. Take care of others as long as you can but don't ever be a victim. Stay in control and make good decisions but don't ever be a victim of anyone ever.

As my son and I rode in my new 4wd truck ahead of the snowstorm we drove through a blizzard from the Little America Motel in Flagstaff to the Grand Canyon. When we reached there it was 31 degrees in a blizzard of  snow. They were expecting 2 feet of snow so we drove to Sedona which is several thousand feet less in altitude at about 4500 feet or so. It snowed a foot there overnight. Then we drove to Prescott where it snowed again but less this time. That night it was 7 degrees Fahrenheit at the Grand Canyon and about 14 to 20 at Prescott in the morning. From there we drove to Palm Springs and watched "Paul" a movie that I wanted my son to see after taking pictures of the desert blooming flowers and ocotillo and other catuses in bloom on the way on the back roads between Prescott and Blythe. I spent the night in a hotel near San Bernadino and then my son and I drove to Bakersfield for my friends military funeral with an honor guard and the guns saluting him.  Though I couldn't speak when I arrived in Bakersfield at the Hotel because I was so upset about my friends death and funeral, my wife and son talked in the adjoining hotel room while I slept off my upsetedness at my friend's death and funeral. So, the next day God had healed me enough so we could be supportive and helpful to my Friends sisters and extended family from all over. So, once again I'm grateful to my son and my wife for being there for me at my friend's funeral. I don't think I could have gone alone that far to this and been okay otherwise. They both knew it and were there for me. Rest in Peace old friend.