Monday, February 6, 2012

Adulthood

In California where I grew up from 1952 when I was 4 years old after being born and living the first 4 years of my life in Seattle, Washington, adulthood was always about learning to drive alone in a car. So, the journey to adulthood for me was on a bicycle riding down streets and roads starting at age 5. Because I was a boy I was given much more freedom than girls were usually, even at age 5. Partly because the culture then believed all us boys would grow up to be soldiers and civilization would end then in a nuclear confligration that ended life on earth. This was always a given especially right after World War II until the late 1980s when the Soviet Union Collapsed. But, besides all that boys were being prepared for adulthood from I would say birth in those days in preparation for "The Final Battle" which was loosely coached in secular Christian thinking which permeated society in the 1950s in the United States.

So, I began to begin to see myself as an adult very early starting when I was 4 or 5. I was told at age 4 to sit still while the dentist pulled out all my front baby teeth without novacaine. I did this because my father asked it of me to save money on Novacaine. Being able to withstand pain was what was expected of all us little soldiers. Though life was crazy then just like now, it was crazy in a completely different way than now. There were many less people in the world. And unlike now most were not well educated and most not at all. I didn't really confront this until I went to India in 1985 where then 60% of the people had no formal education at all. So, my son's realization that "These people think we are gold plated E.T's" was a fairly accurate one out in the country where maybe less than 20% or less had any education at all. However, in some ways all these people had more common sense than found in many educated people in the U.S. So, I suppose it all balances out somehow. In most of the world those who have enough common sense live to breed and those who don't just don't make it. The more successful a culture is economically the less this last statement is true for that culture I find, unfortunately.

I tried for years to get my youngest daughter to ride her bicycle more so she would be more psychologically ready to drive a car. Driving a car is completely different than being at school or being at home. If you get in that car and just start driving you have to start dealing with "Do I have enough gas?" or "Do I have enough money?" or "AM I rested enough to be driving?" or "AM I in an adult enough state of mind to even consider driving right now?" or "If I am not rested enough I need to buy a coffee or something to stay awake driving." or "The weather doesn't look good I should stop driving." or any of a number of other issues one deals with while driving a vehicle anywhere on earth.

And then as much as now, "Am I able to psychologically and physically able to take care of myself and evolved enough in my thinking to survive whatever situations I find myself in while driving or at a location I am not familiar with?" or "Can I fix a flat tire?" or "Do I know how to call for help in an emergency?" or " What if there is no cell phone reception where I am if I break down?" For drivers around the world, you all know exactly what I'm talking about. However, for my daughter and all the other daughters and sons out there just starting to learn to drive this might be news.

I guess what I'm saying is that the culture I grew up in was more conducive to becoming a good driver than the culture my youngest daughter has grown up in. So, her older sister and older brother and mother and I worry about her becoming a good enough driver fast enough to be safe enough to survive the roads for her sake and others. And this is not an unusual concern for fathers and mothers around the world helping their kids to learn to drive both now and in the future.

So, I guess what I'm saying is that I considered myself to be a full adult when I got my license to drive the day I turned 16 and bought my first car one month later. Yes. It is very true we all were much more grown up at 15 or 16 than kids generally are today. I think that is mostly because we all expect to live much longer than people generally lived when I grew up. 60 is the new 40 is more true than most people think. When I grew up most people 40 acted then like 60 year olds do now and then often died as often as 60 year olds do now only at 40. Because of exercise and diet and education life expectancies have raised to the point where a 30 year old can reasonably expect to be 90 in the U.S. That is an incredible difference from the 1950s.

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