Childfree adults?

I was reading this and thinking about what is REALLY going on here. And what I came up with is this. Today I might not have any children at all even though I love kids simply because as a young person I might not be able to afford them. In the 1980s at times I had trouble supporting my children even though we had two businesses especially as they became teenagers and more and more expensive. I feel very grateful that all have college degrees and none became criminals or had serious problems of any kind. But, I'm not sure I would have kids today, simply because they are just too expensive. Unless you are born rich or are a workaholic (not everyone is) kids (the expense and effort of raising kids) could completely ruin your life today. This wasn't as true in the 1960s and 1970s or even in the early 1980s. But, by 1990 and after kids often just ruin your life because they are just too expensive to raise and they likely are going to reduce your quality of life if you have them today.

Would I in my day have foregone having children? No Way! But, that was then and this is now. Mostly I see this as an economic issue more than anything else. Being a slave for your kids isn't a life that most people would want. So, today many people I think are wisely choosing to either not have kids or to adopt because there are so many kids not being cared for and abused already. But, this choice isn't for everyone either. So, there is no perfect road and each of us have to find their own way.

For example, our housekeeper is a single mother of 3 and here is what she tells me: "I don't have time to watch TV ever and I'm working 7 days a week. My kids complain I never spend time with them because I'm working all the time."

So, she isn't married, has no backup support has 3 kids one of them almost out of high school and is pushing 40. What fun is that if you are working 7 days a week and can't even spend any time with your kids because you have to work 7 days a week to support them?

This is what having kids means if you don't have two earners often here in the U.S.


begin quote from:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/childless-women-discrimination_us_58b6f352e4b0780bac2f3413

03/01/2017 04:33 pm ET | Updated 6 hours ago

This May Explain Why So Many People Feel Outraged About Childfree Adults

Parenthood is often seen as a moral imperative, according to new research.

By Carolyn Gregoire

FatCamera via Getty Images

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There was once a time when deciding not to have children automatically made you a social pariah. And even as an increasing number of people are choosing not to become parents, the social bias against childfree adults persists.

Birth rates among 20-something women have declined steeply as millennials delay marriage and having kids in order to focus on things like education, career, personal growth and financial stability. Many others aren’t having children at all, and the number of women who have chosen to forgo motherhood altogether has doubled since 1970. 

Yet many people still consider the decision to forgo parenthood as not only abnormal and surprising, but also morally wrong, suggests new research from Indiana University-Purdue University. 

The findings, published in the March issue of Sex Roles: A Journal of Research, show that most people view parenthood as a moral imperative for men and women. 

For the study, 204 psychology students at a Midwestern university read a short passage about a married adult and then rated their feelings toward the person and their perception of the person’s level of psychological fulfillment. The only details in the passages that changed were the character’s gender and whether they had chosen to have kids. 

Childfree men and women were consistently viewed as being less personally fulfilled than those who had two children. This is likely due to the fact that the participants reported significantly greater feelings of moral outrage ― including anger, disgust and disapproval ― toward the voluntarily childless people.

Perceiving the childfree people as less fulfilled acts as a way of “punishing” them for violating what’s often considered to be both a social norm and a moral imperative, according to study author Dr. Irene Ashburn-Nardo.

Parenthood is a cultural norm ― and as with other norms, violations are not looked upon kindly. Research has shown that people who diverge from social role expectations often face backlash from other members of society for defying the unwritten social contract.  

People who violate social role expectations based on widely shared cultural stereotypes are subject to perceivers’ backlash. Dr. Irene Ashburn-Nardo

“Through parents and peers, people learn that parenthood is both typical and expected,” Ashburn-Nardo wrote. “People who violate social role expectations based on widely shared cultural stereotypes are subject to perceivers’ backlash, such as social and economic sanctions and sabotage. This backlash is justified in the minds of perceivers because the targets are thought to have brought it upon themselves by not fulfilling their expected roles.”

Of course, the fact that childless women are widely discriminated against shouldn’t come as news to anyone. Childlessness has been described as the “final female taboo,” and women who choose not to become mothers are often considered selfish or career-obsessed. Women are still expected to conform to gender stereotypes and are criticized and punished when they don’t.

This enduring bias carries real repercussions. A 2011 study found that women without children suffer from poorer health, likely thanks to the enduring social stigma against childlessness. Childless people are also discriminated against in the workplace, being subject to less schedule flexibility and fewer tax breaks compared to their co-workers who are parents. 

“Other research has linked moral outrage to discrimination and interpersonal mistreatment,” Ashburn-Nardo said in a statement. “It’s possible that, to the extent they evoke moral outrage, voluntarily child-free people suffer similar consequences. ... Exploring such outcomes for this demographic is the next step in my research.”