Even though I am affluent now most of my life wasn't that way. When I was a child I grew up "Blue Collar" with blue collar values even though my father had been valedictorian of his High School. In fact, he never told me this and I had to find this out from my cousin. Likely he didn't tell me this because I had blunt trauma childhood epilepsy from ages 10 to 15 and so he knew I couldn't stress myself out in trying to get straight A's like I did in grade school because of this because of the danger of dying from stress caused seizures at night when I slept which for me were about every 6 months or so at night while I slept.
So, I grew up with what I would call blue collar kindness. This was based upon being born in Seattle where people are very polite like in Canada. Seattle and Canada share this "very polite and kind" way of being. Whereas when I moved to California people are much less formally polite. In California I would say that "controlled Chaos" is the way people tend to function which maximizes experimentalism in a survivable way instead.
Blue Collar kindness is based upon "Survival and loyalty". In other words you are not relying on your parents to bail you out of any bad situation because you are not rich. So, instead you rely on your friends, and in really awful circumstances vandalism or outright violence to defend yourself or your family or your friends from direct or indirect harm. You know you might not be able to wait for the police to protect you because of the area you live in.
So, as I moved from lower middle class to middle class to upper middle class to affluent, I took with me my "Blue Collar Values" that were hard fought and hard won based after high school mostly on the loyalty towards friends and family that is "To the Death" which makes the blue collar creed the strongest of all in regard to both friends and family. Upper class values are mostly based upon money and not upon this kind of "to the death" kind of loyalty. So this makes me suspicious of people who don't have blue collar values like myself.
For me personally, my values come from where the rubber meets the road. So, when my 17 year old daughter judges me for not being as ultimately refined as she wants me to be I say to her, "I have suffered a lot to become the man I am. And I'm not changing for anyone. I like who I am."
My wife who grew up in the upper class and who has 3 college degrees including a Master's degree in Business said she married me because of my kindness, politeness and loyalty which she didn't find in most people and which she highly values. So, even though my youngest daughter doesn't understand who I am because of her time in her prep school my older two children totally do and they value my kindness, loyalty and helpfulness to them "to the death" like I do. And my wife says, "How can you take any 17 year old girl seriously? She hasn't really lived yet." It is true even though we have sent her with her prep school to France, Spain and Japan already, she has never faced any of the things my wife and I have faced yet.
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