Autobiographical Essays on My Life
I decided to compile some essays I wrote in college Creative Writing Classes on my life. I took the ones I like the best and put them here online. Since they were written at different times some aspects of my life will repeat themselves in various ways. However, each essay is written on a different aspect of my life and each are addressing different subjects in general. I hope you will enjoy them as much as I did on reading them for the first time in several years. I have been wanting to do something like this for some time but things didn't come together for it to happen until now. Please enjoy!
Preface to all the Essays
What I am publishing here online is not only a partial history of my present life but also a history of my spiritual life and evolution during this lifetime. It is written and compiled in the hope that it will help make your lives and spiritual quests more survivable and helpful and that you too can evolve past wanting to take your own life when life gets too unbearable to even consider living another day! There is so much joy in life if we can just make it through the miserable parts. Take your life in your own hands and Create a life you can stand to live. Co-Create with God a life than contains as much joy and life as possible.
A New Lifetime-1948
written in 2000 AD put online May 31st 2005
In order to properly start with 1948 and my birth I need to begin with my conception in summer 1947. After having been married a little over a year to my father, my mother wanted a child. My father was 31 and wasn't sure about being a father. So my mother tricked him into having me by telling him she was already pregnant even though she knew full well she wasn't.
I think at some time during my life she told him the truth but I'm not clear exactly when that happened. However, when she confided in me this incident I was somewhere between 12 and 15 years old and she seemed to take great glee in sharing this with me like it had been a burden to keep this secret. Maybe this was because she knew if she hadn't done this she never would have become a mother. Mom identified very much with Mary, the mother of Jesus so for her having me was for her like having Jesus. However, this way of thinking is a lot to lay on any child.
Some time in April, I was born a little after midnight in the first few minutes of the new day. I was 24 inches long and the tallest baby ever born at Waldo Memorial Hospital in Seattle.
My mother speaks to me of going to her church in Seattle. It was a very unusual religion for that time and era. It was very similar to Christian Science and Church of Religious Science and Unity. She and my father believed that people followed in the footsteps of Christ to become like him through perserverance and reincarnation.
In this religion affirmations and what they called decrees were given in unison invoking what they wished from God. They were less asking for things and were more seeing themselves as the sons and daughters of God and as Co-creators with God. A part of this religion was demanding their rights as Sons and Daughters of God to become physically manifest and spiritually manifest here on Earth.
From my present vantage point of 52 I look back upon all this in an entirely different light than I was taught as a child. I have experienced first hand just how good and how bad these types of dynamic invocations can be. It is my personal experience that when a compassionate right mindful and wise person issues these dynamic prayers that they can do great good for all. However, when unbalanced immature souls issue these same types of degrees they can create great havoc in people's lives and all they touch. Compassion towards all life in the universe, as well as wisdom and maturity are absolutely necessary for good results ongoing!
My mother later told me that she thought all these decrees affected me in the womb before birth as well as after birth she hoped in a positive way. It could be said that I was trained in "higher consciousness" even before birth as well as after birth.
My mother was always a very special person. I always admired my mother's singing voice and compassionate speaking voice and a general common sense and levelheadedness that I found absent from most women in the 1950's. It wasn't that most women weren't capable it was just that they didn't seem to be encouraged in their true capabilities by society in the 1950's. Because of the compassion, love and wisdom that I was always given by my mother and my grandmother who lived with us I have always revered women.
Mother prayed to a being her religion called the Elohim Hercules. He was one of Seven Elohim who supposedly built the Solar System. It was believed that a seven fold flame existed in spirit on the forehead of every human symbolic of each human soul being like a child of the Elohim.
While on the Cross Jesus spoke these words in Aramaic, "Eloi! Eloi! Lama Sabacthani" There are at least two translations or more. The best translation direct to English is, "My God, My God, how thou hast glorified me!" In this statement by Jesus "Eloi" is a plural noun for God that in English has become now Elohim.
My mother later believed that her prayers to the Elohim Hercules, Lord of the Blue Ray and spiritual Strength with the Solar System caused me to be very tall and strong as a child and adult. I personally believe my spiritual strength was invoked during my gestation period.
Later in life I watched so many people lose hope in their spirits whereas each time my life became difficult it only seemed to make me grow spiritually stronger in the long run. This doesn't mean I haven't been severely tested over and over again. It just means that no matter how bad I was crushed or destroyed I always seemed to be able to rebound unlike many people I have known.
I believe I owe my spiritual strength to God, and to my spiritual teachers which include my parents, relatives and friends.
By God's Grace
 |
|
No comments:
Post a Comment