Monday, August 23, 2010

There are no problems only opportunities 8-23-10

This is a reprint from a 2005 article I wrote at my old Yahoo Geocities website. It seemed both useful and important so I thought I would share it here:

There Are No problems only Opportunities!
Monday April 5th 2005
When I did not think I could survive my divorce and custody battle I was 46. It seemed to me that I was too far along in life to survive such a terrible thing.However, I did survive because I took to heart "There are no problems only opportunities!" You too, can survive almost anything with this attitude! Here are some helpful ideas in that process.
Reactive Language---------------------Proactive Language
Don't say:There's nothing I can do----Say:Let's look at our alternatives
Don't say:that's just the way I am----Say:I can choose a different approach
Don't say:he or she makes me so mad---Say:I control my own feelings
Don't say:They won't allow that-------Say:I can create an effective presentation
Don't say:I have to do that-----------Say:I will choose an appropriate response
Don't say:I can't---------------------Say:I choose
Don't say:I must----------------------Say:I prefer
Don't say:If only---------------------Say:I will
You don't have to do anything but breathe and eat to live. Anything else YOU CHOOSE TO DO. Weigh the consequences and make the choice.
Proactive people make love a verb not just a feeling. LOVE is something you do:the sacrificies you make,the giving of self, like a mother bringing a newborn into the world. If you want to study love, study those who sacrifice for others, even for people who offend or do not love in return. Love is a value that is actualized through Loving actions.

To be honest with you I don't think I composed and wrote this. What I think happened is that I found this an copied it but then after saving it my then PC computer crashed and I could no longer find the source once it was fixed. This is likely where I got this wonderful worksheet for living: "There are no problems only opportunity". However, I will tell you that this is the key out of depression and a return to a fully useful and potentially wonderful life. Once you disconnect from seeing any problems as problems but only seeing them as opportunity you are free. You are on your way to freedom!

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