It began on a summer day in Mt. Shasta when the first pages of Arcane came through. I had gone to what was then called Pine Grove Health food store on Lassen Lane a few blocks from where I lived in Mt. Shasta. I looked up at mt. Shasta and got out a pen and began to write longhand on the brown paper grocery bag that my food had been in that I bought then. This began my present writing style.
However, it could be also said that in 1969 when many bad things in life turned my life upside down that this style really sort of began when my Uncle Tommy who is sort of an enigma in my family for a variety of reasons showed up in spirit to help me stay alive through this time in my life. However, all those writings my mother threw away because they were channelings from Tommy directly telling me what I had to do to stay alive. She had once been in love with Tommy before she married my father so I could see how it was too spooky for her. However, these writings helped me stay alive when likely nothing else could between 1969 and 1973 in my life then.
I remember walking to the top of a nearby hill thinking that I was going to make my Ascension as I had been raised very religious as a mystical Christian. My parents had been in charge of the Los Angeles "I AM" Sanctuary on Hope Street from the time I was 6 to 12 years old. Then my mother's father had passed on and my mother had a nervous breakdown for a few years because of all the unresolved things between her and her father left unresolved.
So, my writing style came from a lot of suffering in my life. It didn't just appear magically one day.
In fact, I was thinking on that day in 1980 of how I could heal myself from the traumas in my life by writing using all the things I had learned in studying in college to be a psychologist in the early 1970s.
Though I never became a psychologist because my then live in girlfriend got pregnant and we got married in 1974 I learned a great deal which has helped me and countless people in my life so far about how to re[-parent yourself in order to survive your own life. This is something people often do who survive from 18 to 25 especially.
It still amazes me in many ways how ANYONE at all survives to be 25 or 30 years of age and why so many don't.
What kills young people the most?
Unrealistic Expectations.
This is a Universal Truth.
The best way that I can put this is: "You have no idea really what will work for you and keep you alive to 25 or 30. So, you better be open to learning whatever it is that will keep you alive to 25 or 30 or you will never make it to 25 or 30."
This is what I have to say about that.
Somehow between my parents and girlfriends and friends I survived to 25 when I met my first wife. Because I met my first wife and we had a son who is now 51 with a family of his own I survived my 20s and made it into my 30s. This is the best way I can say this now.
Life at BEST is a very rocky road indeed.
And I think compassion for yourself and others and being very pragmatic about everything likely will serve you well if you want to make it to 30.
Even when Doctors talk about people in general they say:
"If you live to be 30 you will often see 90" (which it appears I might be on my road to now at age 77).
My present wife's biological mother is 95 and is slowly passing on by the way. It doesn't really matter what age a parent dies it still is very hard.
When my father passed away when I was 37 and he was 69 I wasn't really right for about 13 years until I almost died myself from a heart virus.
My statement about my own 30s would be: "It was a lot of fun but exhausting".
My statement about my 40s would be: "I barely survived my 40s at all."
My present wife saved my life from age 50 onward all the way to my present 77 years of age.
Life is difficult at every age not just from 15 to 30. It's just that if you can somehow survive from 15 to 30 often you might also live to 90 or more too.
By God's Grace
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