What is Love?

After watching the movie "Her" I realized I now was an authority on love (Ha Ha).

So, "What is Love?" Love (at least from the perspective of someone 65) is not at all what people might think at age 15 or 20. Love is not sex or dancing (although it sure seems like it is when you are 15 to 25). And for some, it is a good substitute until they find the real thing.

When I was young I dated many girls from my age 15 to 25. Some people seem to find the right person right away. And it wasn't that I didn't find the right person it was that I wasn't ready to stay with anyone yet. So, about 2 or more of the girls I dated I loved enough to marry but I wasn't ready for that at the time. So, this was a factor in my feeling suicidal from ages 21 to 25 because I was deeply in love with at least 2 of the girls I had dated for 1 or more years each between ages 15 and 21. But then, like a lot of fellows feeling entirely wrecked by finding the right girl or girls and not being ready to settle down then at 21 I wanted to commit suicide partly as a result of this confusion. But, luckily I didn't die directly or just by taking too many physical risks between 18 and 25 at which point my live in girlfriend got pregnant and we decided to get married and have my son while married.

Was this love? Yes. But that didn't mean I also didn't love every girl I had dated to a greater or lesser degree and a couple of them I could have married had I been ready to in any way shape or form by 21 or ever.

So, what is love? Love is caring about others whether they are parents or relatives or friends. Love is staying with your children as you have them and not abandoning them. I have seen people who turned away from their biological children not make it at all because they just didn't have it together enough to understand this and to just take care of their kids. It doesn't really matter whether you are a guy or a gal your love for your kids and putting them before your own needs will tend to keep you alive after 35 or 40. Otherwise you might lose respect for yourself and drink yourself out of existence or self destruct in other ways. So, understanding that your kids are sort of like your arms and legs and heart and brain walking around. So, if you can't honor your arms, legs, heart or brain walking around then how do you expect to stay alive? One can love a whole lot of people in a whole lot of ways but the love for your children or parents needs to be honored in order for most people to stay sane.

So, what is love? Love is what you feel for your friends whether you sleep with them or not.

The ideal spouse is a friend that you share interests with.  (Doesn't sound very sexy does it?) But, in the end a friend you are sexually attracted to might be the best person to settle down with. Is this love?

My answer likely would be "Yes!" This is love of the most long lasting and useful kind as long as both of you are sane and grownups by that time in both your lives.