Friday, September 6, 2019

Writing is like Talking to an imaginary friend that actually is interested in and wants to hear what you have to say

Like many of you out there I grew up an only child of parents who were mystical Christian ministers (especially when I was 6 to 12 years of age. So, in some ways when I needed my parents most they were not there (except on Saturdays) when often we would go to the beach or mountains or deserts near Los Angeles where we actually lived when I was 6 to 12 years of age.

So, there was a lot of time when I didn't have friends there to talk to or who I could share my life and secrets with all the time like kids who might have brothers and sisters might have. But, after about age 6 I did have a cousin who was 5 years older than I who eventually became a lawyer by going on scholarship to USC and NYU law school. So, he set a very good example for me scholastic wise.

However, for my personality type becoming a lawyer might be the very LAST thing I would ever choose to do maybe after jumping off a 100 foot cliff onto rocks below. So, in this sense this wasn't something I would ever choose to do for myself.

But, he and I were like brothers from the time I was 6 to 8 years of age and from 8 to 12 years age (My ages) (when he entered college and moved to downtown LA where USC is, we saw a lot of each other and often he would come to Seattle or Idaho where my grandparents had a house and land (Seattle) and my Grandfathers several thousand acre mining claim near Elk City, Idaho where he was about 6 months a year mining when the weather was good enough after he retired.

So, the point I'm making is that we cannot always have the exact conversations we want in life because there isn't the right person there at the time for this. But, you can have a conversation with your future self from your past self (the one writing whatever you write) which can be amazing too!

So, I guess what I'm saying is your imaginary friend often is your future self (one of them). Also, it is a way to understand and to heal the wounds of your childhood and to better understand everything in your life around the time it happens.

Because your older more mature self can help you make sense of things you couldn't make sense of at the time.

For example, lately I'm processing how I feel betrayed by my parents. No. They didn't mean to harm me they did the best they could. However, often we are still harmed by our parents ignorance of whatever is going on in our lives when it happens. So, though I don't hate my parents because they meant no malice and were good people, still they damaged me a lot (by accident).

Like the saying: "Even if a blind man steps on your foot in the dark by accident it still hurts!"

So, processing all this without blaming or hating my folks is useful to me right now I find.

We all are hurt by life along the way. We all have various kinds of PTSD from what happened. We can survive these times or we can let those times destroy us. It's always our choice.

I choose to move on and make a life for myself and always have. And now I'm retired I travel a lot with my wife and friends and sometimes my kids which is great when that happens.

By God's Grace



























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