Dealing with Death in Relatives and Family members

Once you get to about 40 or 50 just expect most people you grew up with (especially the older ones) to start dying a lot.

This just comes with the territory. So, you sort of have to have your act together by 30 or 40 to go through all this and come out the other side in one piece. One of the harder things to do is to lose your father and mother. My father passed away in 1985 when I was 37 and realistically it took me until I was 50 and almost dying of a heart virus for about 8 months to move me past that one. Then, likely the hardest thing I ever had to deal with was my mother around 82 going into Senile dementia. Death is relatively easy for me to deal with  (especially as an intuitive) because often I can be with my family and friends even when they first go to the other side when they pass on. So, I can sort of follow their progress after they pass.

However, when someone passes away from Alzheimers or senile dementia it's very different when they pass on because all that time confused often means they aren't cognizant after they pass on either. So, this was very difficult because my mother didn't know who I was the last 2 years of her life.

I went to see her 2 years before she passed away and when I said, "Mom. your grandson and I are here to see you." Her answer was  to blow me and my son a raspberry because she no longer knew who we were and didn't believe me. This was really hard to deal with.

So, I would say the worst thing to deal with might be alzheimers or senile dementia and it's affect on mates or their children because sometimes this not only takes out the parent with this condition but also their mate or one of their single children become crazy or dead through this process.

This especially happens to people who are single with no other rational person around to talk to when caring for a mate or elder.

So, if you can put your relative in a facility of some kind and visit them rather than live with them you are less likely to go insane or kill yourself from taking care of them until they die.

Life is for the living and Alzheimers and senile dementia are both fatal diseases. The sooner everyone understands this the better.

Once you are diagnosed you are going to die from that unless you die from something else first.
 

Around 2010 I decided to add up all the people I had lost to death and it came to about 30 to 50 people that I knew and loved during my life that were either relatives or friends.

If you are in a good relationship or marriage, especially if you have children or grandchildren, losing parents or grandparents or aunts or uncles or cousins or friends is more bearable.

The problem is if you are alone. Then you can feel really alone in a way you might not have felt ever before.

Then these deaths can be very problematic to deal with.

However, if you live long enough you are likely to see most of the people you grew up with die.This is just life. And you either find a way to deal with it or you are either crazy or dead too. This is the way life really is.