Even without AI I had a very hard time staying alive from age 21 to 25 myself

I found facing disappointment on many different levels wasn't something that I could manage well.

I think my life growing up had been too easy in some ways for me to survive this well.

In my Church at least I knew people from all over the world like England, Switzerland, Austria, France, Germany, Australia, New Zealand, Canada and the U.S.

However, I broke up with my church girlfriend because when I asked her to marry me she said she would marry me only if we were celibate throughout our marriage. Now I can laugh about this now but this wasn't working for me then  at all.

So, I started moving towards suicide and wound up leaving my childhood church with friends all over the world. So, staying alive became a problem for me.

However, I always had girlfriends because I was always very tall and handsome. However, for me, personally I had no reason in my mind why I still wanted to be alive for myself even though I always had a girlfriend.

So, I stayed alive ONLY for my girlfriends and parents and friends. I had no desire at all to live during this time.

So, one of my thoughts is that 

"It's a miracle that ANYONE lives to be 30 years old!" 

I thought this at 30 and I still think this at 77 1/2 years old.

What brought me out of this state?

My live in girlfriend got pregnant we got married and my son was born.

I couldn't worry about what I wanted then I had to raise my son right.

I haven't had any problems trying to stay alive ever since.

By God's Grace 

"It's a miracle that ANYONE lives to even be 30 years old!"