So, of course when they trained me to be a right handed person because I favored my left hand this didn't help my handwriting at all. However, I think in the end I likely was more ambidextrous than anything else but likely I would have been a left handed writer if anyone actually let me do this.
Then my father insisted I have as good of penmanship as he always did and I failed miserably. He didn't let up until I started crying about it and was messed up that I couldn't be what my father wanted which was for me to be a duplicate of him in Penmanship. I was okay in math always though and I was someone who often won spelling bees too.
But, penmanship wasn't going to happen. Finally by age 10 I stopped writing Cursive entirely except for my signature for documents. And since about 10 I just print really fast or I type ever since. So, I guess I showed him didn't I? :)
So, we all have our crosses to carry don't we?
Also, my father never beat me like children were beaten all the time in the 1950s because there had been some abuse in his family growing up and he didn't want it to carry onto me.
However, because of this, if someone wants to upset me it is always through words. So, beating the crap out of me might not bother me but words can be really upsetting and painful.
So, the result he wanted is not the result he got in this case.
So, I have to be really careful when women especially verbally abuse me to hold my temper always.
But, since I'm a very self disciplined person I usually just put my fist through a wall so this solved this problem. At least for me.
However, now I'm 78 and not so full of youthful testosterone so I don't put my fist through walls anymore because I have mellowed with age now. Besides if you miss the plasterboard you might break your hand doing this if you hit a 2 by 4 stud. So, this was never a good idea really but it kept me from harming someone I cared about or loved too.
Most men know not to antagonize a man 6 foot 5 inches tall so it was usually never men who pissed me off. But, I always knew that my father never beating me caused me to be this way. Because he used the violence of words on me rather than his fists or with a belt.
Only one time did I do something bad enough for a public flogging and so I accepted this punishment okay. I was 8 or 9 at the time and it was literally a public flogging where he took my belt and took me into the front yard for all the neighbors to see me being beaten over and over again with my own belt.
This sort of thing was normal in the 1950s but not now.
It is how absolute order was always maintained by adults all the time, especially white folks were like this even though Black folks often still use this method because it is still very effective at getting results even though you always are going to be traumatized for life.
I think when they gave me a .22 rifle and bullets to keep in my bedroom at age 8 (my grandmother gave me the .22 and she was from Texas where she had grown up wealthy. However I also knew if I misused this weapon and bullets that I might be killed or severely wounded for it by those around me.
They didn't give you responsibilities that they didn't think you were worthy of then and if you misused this trust you might be killed for it still in the 1950s. This was life in the 1950s for everyone big or small then of every race.
Death was right around the corner if you misbehaved always. And it wouldn't be the police who killed you usually either. You would just disappear and wind up buried in someone's back yard then.
We all lived with this reality then.
However, that being said I never got a public beating in School in Grade School, Junior High or High School because I was always too smart for that. Many children were beaten within an inch of their lives in public school and private school then in the 1950s by the way.
