Tuesday, July 14, 2020

One member of a family dying can change that family for generations!

I was thinking about the case of Trump's Grandfather dying in his 40s in the spring of 1918 from coronavirus and we see the result of how messed up psychologically Trump is from this one death. Then we add this the death of his older Brother Fred from Alcoholism in his 40s  the deaths from these psychological problems just seem to mount and get worse generation after generation.

In my own family my Uncle Tommy died likely in a plane crash in 1942 and this destroyed the family ever after in many ways. My middle name is Thomas after him by the way. My father said Tommy was the nicest person in the family and so his loss was incalculable and I saw how my family was devastated by this loss ongoing and it had different effects throughout the family. For my Dad he kept Tommy's 1941 Century Buick column shift that both Tommy and Dad used to Street race with. My father kept Tommy's car until 1956 in memory of his brother when he bought a brand New Century Buick in 1956.

But, losing a dear family member destroys a family in many different ways. The family may physically survive but it tends to be brittle from this loss in many ways too.

Imagine how many families now are destroyed worldwide with the breadwinner (male or female) having died from Coronavirus?

How does one go forward having been devastated by the loss of the breadwinner while also experiencing Grief which destroys a family too often.

When my wife lost her mother in 1999 I thought I might lose her because she wasn't prepared to lose her mother. She just wasn't prepared to lose her mother when he mother was 74. She expected her mother to live at least into her 80s or 90s. But this didn't happen. I had lost my own father in 1985 and this screwed me up and helped cause a divorce in 1994 even though he had died in 1985. I wasn't exactly right but messed up with middle Aged Crazy and grief until I almost died in 1998. At this point I became grateful for each day of life I had left and stopped being in middle Aged crazy anymore.

By being grateful for each day I had left I overcame middle Aged Crazy where you start to realize that you are not immortal and death is coming eventually for you but you don't know when.

When you stop worrying about this and are just grateful for each day you have left this is much better.

By God's Grace

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