what is Healing?

 From my present perspective healing is perceptual but sort of perceptual-physical.

It's easier for a human being to start with the perceptual before the physical even though both are important.

For example, I was hopeful but also scared going in for my Robotic Hernia Surgery and I knew it was the best hope for me to stay alive. Still, I had to be very brave to face this and then to think about 6 weeks recovery time.

So, in order to heal I needed this operation which I had been prevented from getting for the last 4 years even after I found the best Robot Hernia Surgeon on the West Coast in Redding by my cardiologist because he told me 4 years ago my heart wasn't strong enough to be put completely under anymore. So, I waited until I almost died in the emergency room January 4th 2026.

Then my cardiologist reassessed my heart condition and said that because of my Defibrillator pacemaker installed in June of 2020 and because I began taking Amiodarone in 2022 my heart had grown much stronger and likely capable of withstanding a anesthesia which emulated a comatose state where my body could not move at all which is what is needed for this type of operation.

But, I remember having an oxygen mask put on my face and since I'm a little claustrophobic from Whooping cough at age 2 so I asked if I could take the oxygen mask off. The Lady Anesthesiologist said that I needed to have it on at the time so I put up with it. Now I realize that the metallic smell to the oxygen mask was likely a part of my anesthesia which continued for some degree up to a week later where I wasn't supposed to drive a car.

Then, the first week I was in pain and had trouble walking and needed help to get out of bed from my wife which bothered me a lot because I came from a more macho kind of era (born 1948). But, after the first week I had no pain at all and had figured out ways to get up more on my own ergonomically.

I guess what I'm saying is healing can be about having the will and the resources to go through something like this so you don't die which is a mental and physical discipline of doing what it takes to stay alive through whatever comes in your life.

So, what is healing?

It can be very simple or it can be very complex especially with today's really advanced medicine which I experience as nothing short of a miracle in my life at this point.

Otherwise, it is likely I would have died from something similar to diverticulitis by December without this robotic Hernia surgery.

So, the whole thing regarding staying alive this time at least was being able to do what I did to survive my life and to find this surgeon and to get the go ahead from my cardiologist for this operation to save my life.

By God's Grace