My 20s were Hell! This is the best way to put this. I barely survived even age 21 which likely was the worst when I had to leave two women or more that I was in love with and my childhood church. This likely (Psychologically at least) was the hardest thing I had to do. I never had problems with Alcohol because my father and grandfather and I were allergic to alcohol which basically means if we drank we might harm people because it altered our brain chemistry in a really negative way. And I never had problems with Drugs in college. However, in trying to survive 21 to 25 I did have problems becoming a love addict in dating many many women. But, mostly that was about trying to find a way to stay alive. So, if a girl was in love with me I had to stay alive for her out of love and respect for her. So, one by one this was how I stayed alive until I met my first wife and had a son. At this point I had to forget being narcissistic like most men are and only think about how I was going to take care of and support my son to adulthood. In other words I had to stop doing self destructive things, stay alive and take care of my son to adulthood while I watched other male friends die in all sorts of ways along the way. So, for me, getting married and having my son saved my life in thinking about others instead of myself.
By the time I was 29 I was a single divorced father and met my 2nd wife in 1980 when we both were 32. The next 7 years were the happiest of my life up until then! And since I have been 50 (after I recovered from the heart virus in 1998 and 1999 have also been the happiest years of my life as well. So, the last 20 years have been amazingly happy since I was forced to retire in 1998 or die. There really was no other choice then to make. Either retire or die! Luckily, God provided for me to do this. But, then again I had prayed for "The Leisure to Practice" since 1980 when I realized this is what Buddhists do so they can pray 24 hours a day for all mankind ongoing. You generate a heaven realm around yourself for feet, miles ongoing until it encompasses the whole planet and then galaxy and then universe depending upon your level of enlightenment and attainment.
So, stay alive! Your life might be the ongoing adventure that mine was!
Life is never perfect but it can be amazing! Like My life has been!
By God's Grace
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