Writing

 Healing oneself or others through writing is a useful thing to do. 

One thing I found helpful when I was going through an awful divorce in 1994 until late 1995 was to write Haiku poems.

There was something about writing in Haiku where you are a minimalist word wise where you say things as concise as possible that I found helpful.

I had been married to my 2nd wife 14 years and trying to break way from 14 years of actions and habits I found really hard. Often I would inhale popcorn or crushed ice or even candy into my lungs then to tell you just how distressed I was subconsciously and consciously and I didn't eat much for about a month at one point and my present wife was worried when she first met me because I was very thin (even though I'm almost 6 foot 5 inches tall so she was worried about me surviving all this.

So, I found writing Haiku by being a word minimalist I could write poems with a few words as possible.

Though these poems are not really in the Haiku format these were some of the things I wrote to survive those times:

 

Honey Bear Talks to me

The tea warms my soul

All is well
 

When we are quiet

Your presence

Heals my soul

 

Innocence and wisdom live together

The seeds of being found are in being lost

So, finding a way forward where none existed before helps one to create a new life when the old one is gone forever.

And in minimalist writing of very few words often you can reach points where a lot of words would only confuse you when you are going through something awful in your life.

A Divorce or break up is sort of like a death in your life and the longer you have been together the harder it is on you both.

For example, my ex-wife for that time and I still don't really talk to each other except for once every few years even though we had one biological daughter together and raised our older kids from a previous marriage together. So, for me, the saddest part of that divorce was our oldest children had had to endure two divorces and our biological daughter together had to endure only one divorce. WE were both adults and should be able to deal with anything. But, survival is a funny thing.

For me, every girlfriend or wife in my life I never stopped loving but at a certain point trust and respect is gone and then the relationship ends.

However, my first wife and I have remained friends through the years.

Traditionally for thousands of years some women live in denial which I think is for the children but mostly it doesn't serve a useful function to my way of thinking.

Moving on one way or another is a way to survive all this but many aren't able to do this. I'm glad I have always been able to move forward to a new life each time so it's sort of like reincarnating when one relationship ends. Something like that. IN other words you have no choice but to become someone else in order to survive and keep going in your life.

By God's Grace