Zen Koan

Zen Koan

I have recently discovered that I and thousands of others on earth are literally “Living Zen Koans”.

Some Zen Koans you may have heard of before. But I think the most famous of them all is: “What is the sound of one hand clapping?”

Then there is the Koan that isn’t a Koan and yet really is: “The way that can be thought of or spoken of is not the true path or true way”.

And then there is my personal Koan that I now share with all of you, given to me personally by my Guru, Saint Germain, which is: “If you are ready to live forever you might die right now, but if you are ready to die right now you may live forever- - -“

Now you may or may not know that the purpose of a Zen Koan is to break your mind (literally). In other words one’s normal old fashioned way or ways of seeing things interferes with seeing things the way they actually are.

In other words cultural perceptions of all kinds tend to interfere with “Real Perception” of yourself and the universe. So unless a way is found to break away from conditioned responses, one cannot clearly see either oneself or the universe or one’s place in it or one’s relationship to everything in the universe in all time and space or even perceptions beyond that.

So, the way life dealt with me is that it literally “killed me”. What I mean by this is that although my body is still alive here at age 62 here in 2010 as I write this I died “psychologically” between July and November 1969. I was very aware of dying during this time. Every reason I could think of to go on living was gone for me at that point in my life. Over 90% of all reasons I had then to live on or succeed in any way were gone the way I saw things then. So I asked God permission to take my own life. I said to God, “Everything I was born to do is impossible now. So logically I must take my own life, God”. However, God’s response was literally: “Taking any human life including your own is to literally cut off one of God’s fingers”.

So I realized that to commit suicide would dishonor God. So to honor God I stayed alive without any meaning or purpose left for me. Within the next two years of this completely meaningless and hollow existence I returned to college at Palomar College in North San Diego County in Southern California. It was a really wonderful environment as colleges go, and I got into studying psychology, Philosophy and Cultural Anthropology. While studying Cultural Anthropology I realized that I was a natural shaman. I read a definition that I paraphrase here. “A natural Shaman is someone who has psychologically died whose body somehow lives on without them. Such a person is as comfortable talking with the dead as with the living and lives in both the world of the living and the world of the dead simultaneously. Such a person is valuable to his tribe and family and friends as a healer and facilitator between this world and the next. This was my experience exactly. I had always been clairvoyant in multiple ways ever since Archangel Michael and his band of Archangels had to come visit me and my Grandmother when I was two years old while she sang “ Hark the Herald Angels Sing” during the Christmas season in 1950 while rocking me in our old fashioned deep cushioned rocking chair.

So, the realization that I was a “Natural Shaman” gave me impetus to stay alive and to explore what this meant not only to myself but to all beings I came into contact with both living and those gone over into the next world. So, in my own mind my profession or existence here on earth became “Shaman, Priest, minister”. I had found my calling and why God had kept my body alive at all. But as time went on I found that it was more useful to be a secret “shaman Priest minister” because most people just weren’t ready for how deep all this really went. It was way beyond most people’s understanding of reality as they knew it.

Now, it is very important that all people reading this understand that this is not an easy path at all. However, it was and is the path that God set for me when he would not allow me to kill myself as any logical man would have without God’s intervention in my life. So, in order to keep me alive God gave me the power that I asked from him to help beings here on earth and beyond and to help save lives wherever I went and to allow me to help beings who were dying both human and animal to safe places on the other side as they were dying, dead, or in the process of dying. Since living between worlds was perfectly normal for me there was no fear of death as I had already died at age 21. The only reason I lived from age 21 until my son was born when I was 26 was that God set this path for me to follow and learn on and to help other beings in whatever way I was capable of in that given moment. So, as I used the skills that God developed in me they grew and grew and grew and grew as I used these skills to honor the God that had created my soul somewhere in an eternity of lifetimes on multiple planets and dimensions. I learned to see both my past and future lifetimes millions of years into the past and future. (Although to be honest God does not perceive in Time and Space as we do as humans). He perceives only in the Eternal now. Since there are literally an infinity of Nows for God that is a more useful way to perceive his perceptions because time as we know it is meaningless in that context. There really is only “What is happening right now in eternity?”

As my perceptions grew as God empowered me more and more sometimes I thought I couldn’t bear any more powers because it was just too much to deal with sometimes. Finally one day I said to God, “I just can’t deal with seeing everything good and bad all the time. I can handle seeing angels but the problem with that is seeing them is so intoxicating that I can barely drive a car when that happens. And when I have to see the bad things I’m so freaked out by it that that also interferes with driving a car safely. Please God. Just show me what I need to know that moment. I just can’t survive the rest.” Immediately, God did as I asked. My perceptions changed and I could then deal with everything more efficiently. When I needed to I would clairvoyantly see or hear whatever I needed to see or know world wide, Galaxy wide or universe wide. So, it was like having a sentient computer given to me by God that automatically put my attention upon what I needed to know to help all beings on God’s behalf without endangering me or anyone else.

And the really wonderful thing about this was that I could literally stake my life on any of this newly automatically organized information. So, since I asked God to put all this on Automatic when I was about 25, by age 30 everything was so remarkably integrated that in some ways my life was very charmed and lucky in every way by God’s Grace.

So I would say if you need something ask God for it. If it is practical to your purpose here on earth and beyond he will give it to you. This is my real experience.

And in this way you too will become a “Living Zen Koan” sent to break the minds of mankind and all life in the universe so all beings can be whole “holistic” “One” and not just live as pieces of themselves in disarray like most humans on earth do now.

Happy Oneness everyone!