Chuckles ahead: One liners to cheer you up during the coronavirus: sent to my wife via email

1. When this virus is over I still want some of you to stay away from me.
2. If these months have taught us anything, it's that stupidity travels faster than any virus on the planet, particularly among politicians and bureaucrats.
3.Just a second--so what you're telling me is that my chance of surviving all this is directly linked to the common sense of others? You're kidding right?
4. If you believe all this will end and we will get back to normal once we reopen everything, raise your hand. Now slap yourself with it.
5. Whoever decided a liquor store is more essential than a hair salon is obviously a bald-headed alcoholic.
6 The spread of covid-19 is based on two factors. 1. how dense is the population and 2. HOW DENSE THE POPULATION IS.
7. REMEMBER ALL THOSE TIMES WHEN YOU WISHED THE WEEKEND WOULD LAST FOREVER? WISH GRANTED. HAPPY NOW?
8. It may take a village to raise a child, but I swear it's going to take a whole vineyard to home school one.
9. Did a big load of pajamas so I would have enough clean work clothes for this week.