When we enter our lives we are moved by our experiences that we have with ourselves, our friends, our parents, our teachers, and if we are very lucky with nature and wilderness. My experience of all these things brought me into my early 20s with a desire to keep other young people from suffering in many of the ways I have had to growing up in my life. So, around age 21 to 22 I decided that I might be able to help people by becoming a psychologist, most especially some kind of mystical psychologist. I had noticed that intuitively gifted people when raised by those who denied that anyone could be intuitively gifted often committed suicide, overdosed on drugs and died in various ways as a result. Since I also found that the most incredibly creative of people all tend to be intuitively gifted, especially, musicians, artists, writers, many spiritual practitioners of any religion, psychologists, therapists, medical practitioners of all persuasions and many other people, I realized that many people were killed by society because of their intuitive creative nature. So that either society killed them or they killed themselves either directly or indirectly because of their life experiences in the society that bred them.
So, since I too was working my way out of societal imposed suicidal thoughts I decided to try and help others. There was a program at college called "Operation Share" where I could tutor kids and get credit for helping them through the college. So, I joined this program as a tutor. Another thing I did was to volunteer for a suicide hot line while I was in college. Even before moving in this direction just as a natural intuitive I had more than once quit a job in order to counsel a friend to prevent their suicide. By helping others stay alive I found I also was convincing myself to stay alive as well. As time went on when I studied the lives of people like St. Francis of Assisi (San Francisco was named after him), I realized I was not the only one with a form of post traumatic stress disorder from near death experiences(I had almost died from whooping cough at age 2 and then from Blunt trauma childhood epilepsy from ages 10 to 15). So, as I helped others I found I was able to help myself as well. So, I learned that by giving to help others I got well too. Many nurses like my son share this point of view as well.
However, about 2 years towards this goal I starting living with my girlfriend and she got pregnant and I soon realized I would lose both my girlfriend and my son if I didn't stop college for a while and get a full time job. So, that is what I did. I have never regretted this decision because becoming a father finally made my life make some sense and I found that I was respected immediately by taking responsibility as a father and husband much more than my friends with either bachelor's degrees or master's degrees. I found this kind of stunning at the time.
And I found that I continued to study to become a therapist, natural minister and shaman rather than formally for any one religion but I found I became a minister of the highest truths I could find anywhere in all religions and philosophies and sciences around the world. So, by the time I was 30 I found that many people listened to me and kept asking me to start a religion because I was both intelligent and somewhat enlightened as well. However, my answer always to them was, "People already have enough religions to confuse them already!" Another religion isn't what people need. What they need is to become enlightened in all ways and to become seekers of the truth rather than just followers of another religion that takes their money and confuses them in the end. There is a saying, "Figures don't lie but liars use figures!" So, there is truth and then there is truth. If an ant is your guru, feed him! God is where you find him, her, the Being! So, I kept right on studying and learning wherever God showed me. And even though this path can be a lonely one, I still raised my kids and lived my life and my beliefs wherever God took me. He has taken me all over the earth and I have met amazing people everywhere. God makes life an adventure! God is where you find Him, Her, The Being! And even if you don't believe in God, Life is where you find whatever you are looking for! Don't ever settle for less than a life worth living!
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