I have been retired now for around 25 years since I was forced to retire in 1998. I will be 75 soon

 So, this means I was forced to retire at age 50.

I can remember clearly waking up and walking into the bathroom and my lips felt numb and when I looked into the mirror my lips looked sort of blue which I knew wasn't very good. Also, my arms were sort of numb even though I could still move my hands. Then I walked into the living room and was surrounded by angels and believed I was going to die. Then the white light angels surrounding me started staying: "You aren't going to die. Your Life will get better now!"

And they kept saying this in unison until every cell in my body believed them. This I think is why I'm still alive today.

Since my father died in an ambulance I knew that getting into any ambulance likely would kill me. So, I called my son to come pick me up and take me to the hospital. The next 9 months I kept passing out without panicking because with a heart virus like I had (you often get this from getting your teeth cleaned at the dentists) (you have 1 chance in a 1000 of getting this if any food matter gets into your blood stream while they are cleaning your teeth. Many people die from heart viruses every year.

So, in living through this I was the exception and not the rule. Only because I had had whooping cough and learned a Tibetan Buddhist disconnection meditation did I survive this. If I had panicked passing out all those times even once it would have killed me. But, I guess I'm more self disciplined sort of like a soldier than most people are in this. I just refused to panic even once so I didn't. So, I didn't die then.

My dermatologist's male cousin had died in his late 20s from this so he asked me not to be his patient anymore because every time he saw me it reminded him of his dead cousin so I changed dermatologists in deference to his grief.