That you be the best of friends. Though some younger people say that sexual compatibility is important this likely depends upon what age you are when you get together with this person.
For example, it was much more important in my 3rd marriage what I didn't want in a marriage than what I did. This might sound strange but if you know what YOU CANNOT live with then by the process of elimination you tend to know what might work for you at least
When I got with my present wife she was 39 and I was 46 and though she had lived with boyfriends she had never married. What I needed right then and now was a best friend that would care enough to keep me alive ongoing. And this is what I got by praying for the right person for me to live with.
So, the other thing we found helpful after we married is taking a course in Peer counseling.
The most important thing we learned from this is don't dump your traumas on your significant other, otherwise it will end that relationship.
All the things that really messed up your life your new partner had nothing at all to do with. So, if you cannot separate them from the traumas of your life then that likely will end your relationship with them.
So, you take responsibility for your shit and they take responsibility for their shit in life.
Otherwise this relationship won't survive very long usually.
So, mutual friendship, love and respect is what is important for a relationship that last 32 years like ours has so far.
Some people might ask: "don't you miss dating?"
Luckily I dated so many women between age 15 and 25 and in between marriages that I have nothing left to prove to myself because I have done everything I have wanted to do in a relationship all ready. So, now I'm ready for a peaceful happy relationship.
Also, it's important that you can envision dying alongside of this person I think to because I never could imagine that in any other live in relationship I was in in my whole life.
by God's Grace
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