we all want to change our parents. I did too. But, hopefully by about age 25 or so we start giving up on that

It's great to want your parents to think exactly like you do especially if you are very progressive and 20 or 30 years younger than them.

However, by the time they are 35 or 40 they are not going to change in certain ways. There are certain ways that they see the world that likely are NOT going to change. These ways have to do with their own direct experiences that have taught them deep lessons especially through suffering.

Often if you are young between 13 and 25 especially, you are very enthusiastic and want to change the world right now with your ideas.

However, the reality of the world is often different than you might like it to be.

What is ACTUALLY important you might not be aware of yet.

For example, if you don't survive until 30 all the ideas you want to espouse might be completely meaningless because you will be dead.

So, one of the most meaningful things for you to do is to guard your health and sanity enough so you can actually survive to 30 in the first place.

Because without that, everything you believe is pretty meaningless (in the sense that if you are not there what is the point?).

So, trying to change your parents after they are 35 or 40 is mostly (a waste of your time).

Why?

Because experience has likely taught them something else than you believe in or what you think is important, especially if it is markedly different than what they believe is real and true.


So, maybe the most important thing is to love your parents and to accept who they are.

Because if you demand they change to what you want them to be it might not be possible, ever.

So, in these demands you might alienate your parents and then you would really be sad (or they will be) that you aren't close anymore (or that they cannot accommodate your wishes without compromising their own personal integrity) in some way.

This is mostly just the way things usually are here on earth.