Sunday, October 25, 2009

If you Find a Good Woman

If you are a guy and you find a good woman don't f--- around on her. Life is very tough for everyone rich and poor. If you don't believe this then you have never had to go out and to support yourself and live in the real world yet.

Finding a good woman or a good mate no matter what your preference is is a very hard thing to do. Some few are lucky enough to find a perfect mate in primary school or High School and are happy the rest of their lives (or as happy as it is possible for them to be). I found someone at age 6 that I decided I wanted to marry in my Sunday School at my parent's church and I even went steady with her for 2 years in High School. But because she was a year older than I since I was becoming a man, men are usually about 3 years behind women in emotional maturity. So when she reached 22 I had to watch her marry another man who was then about 25. Since I was only 21 I still had a long way to go in maturity. She recently asked me, "Why didn't you tell me you loved me then?" I said, "I had no idea if or when I would be ready to settle down." Which was the truth. I knew the man that married her was an engineer and I had faith he would do right by her and always take care of her very well financially and otherwise. Did it break my heart? Of course. But I never expected life to be easy and I had memories of being married to her in a previous lifetime in Europe and it didn't turn out well for her as a result of being married to me. So I knew marrying her again wouldn't be a good idea for her as I had many things to do and places to go and people to see and things to learn to be a good husband to her before I was about 30 to 35.

So this helped to contribute to my suicidal thoughts for a couple of years and made my early twenties very difficult. I guess I thought it didn't matter what happened to me. It mattered what happened to her and everyone else. However, until I valued myself more my life didn't turn out as well. When I started valuing both myself and all other humans and all life on earth everything started moving in my life in much better ways.

By age 25 my girlfriend at that time that I loved got pregnant and we eventually got married and stayed together about 4 years total and 3 years married. But by age 29 I was a single parent raising my son alone. My Mom and Dad really loved my son and I and also stepped in to help both my son and I so I could run my business and still raise my son. So after age 26 for me my life was about being a father. So I looked for a new mother for my son. At age 32 I met a lady who divorced the same year as I and who had two kids from her first marriage so 1980 to 1985 became one of the best periods of my life where my dreams started to be fulfilled, I lived in the mountains where I wanted to with my family and friends. I skied in the winter and hiked and swam in mountain lakes and kayaked in the summers. It was a very good and healthy life for my whole family. But eventually in 1994 that dream came to and end with another divorce.

In 1995 I remarried a highly educated lady 7 years younger than I and had another daughter. So now I had 3 biological children and two step kids and through my new wife I also had responsibility for 2 more God Daughters, the youngest of these is now 24.

I have been faithful to my present wife for 15 years and this has been a very good working relationship and we have traveled a lot to Canada, Hawaii, Europe and throughout the Western and Far Eastern States together.

So, once again though I dated a whole lot of women in my 20s I think it is important to note that you only need one good Mate. You really don't need 100 women to make you happy, you just need one good one that you are faithful to and who is your best friend.

Being faithful to a wife might be hard for some but being faithful to my best friend is very easy for me.

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