This is something I personally experienced myself between about age 18 and 25 and many young people don't survive this time in their lives.
Here is my point:
There is what is culturally expected of you. The problem with this is what is culturally expected of you might kill you. This was my experience as a young person. So, if you don't make up your own rules for living, often you are dead. Each person is very unique and trying to do what is culturally expected of us often means death.
Understanding this, one can give up pride and simply find a way to survive their lives.
My rule came to be: "Be as kind as you can to all beings around you and still survive".
This was always very important to me. For example, if a friend was suicidal I might quit my job I had in my late teens or early 20s and go take care of them until they could make it on their own. By doing this it saved my life too often. So, in saving others lives often you also save your own.
But, you have to be very efficient about all this too or else your life will soon be over.
Luckily, my father was Swiss and they are very into efficiency in everything and so this drive for efficiency helped keep me alive through my early 20s until I married and had a son. At that point the danger of me self destructing ended for the most part and my role in life as a father has carried me through ever since.
I never really took on a career as my identity other than business owner. I always liked owning businesses the most. So, I guess my career would be entrepreneur.
But, pride, at least the way my father was proud could never work for me because I'm a completely different person. Each of us are somewhat like our parents but each of us is unique. We cannot be our parents and often we cannot even be the person they want us to be. Unless we are ourselves and find ourselves often we are soon dead by 20 or 30.
Some saw me as a "Golden Boy" growing up and this only added to my problems in some ways. I was tall and handsome and the girls all seemed to love me. This was a lot to deal with always for me.
Some people long for this but let me tell you my personal experience was that it was confusing until I got married and had my first child.
You don't need to be with every woman in the world if you are a man, you just need one good one that is worth having children with. This is the reality of life for me I found. The 1960s and 1970s when I was growing up and in my 20s made this even more confusing regarding all this. When the birth control pill was invented in 1960 it liberated women (and to some degree men too) but it also confused a lot of people, caused STDs to spread especially after the late 1970s and caused AIDS to spread in the 1980s and millions died from AIDS around the world. Some places on earth people are still dying from AIDS because often it isn't diagnosed in 3rd world countries.
The important thing about all this as an individual is one has to find their own way or they are often soon dead.
God Bless all those who find a way to stay alive through all the insanity of this world.
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