You have to have compassion for yourself first

Many people want to change the world. However, the best way to do that is to "Change Yourself" first. We all have incredible wounding in our lives from growing up in various ways. So, until you have compassion for yourself for not living up to other people's or your own expectations you will tend to be ineffective at changing the world around you to be better than it is.

So, changing the world starts with changing yourself first. If you just take the anger you feel and send it outwards to change the world it means you are still a mess. It means that likely the outcome of your rage and anger is only going to cause incredibly more suffering for yourself and everyone you meet.

So, learning first to be kind to yourself is the actual key to learning to be kind to others.

One of the first things useful to do is to let go of unrealistic expectations for yourself given you by others and in reaction you wanting to please others. Wanting to please others (in the end) is one of the primary causes of suicide.

When you realize you cannot please everyone actually ever and see this as a real truth, you begin to see that the only one you might be able to please is yourself. In being kind to yourself you start to become kind towards others. By feeling compassion for your own suffering you start to become compassionate regarding the suffering of others.

During this process you aren't harming or killing anyone and you aren't harming or killing yourself either.

You see that you must be taken care of before you can take care of anyone else. Then you might see that learning to become compassionate towards yourself you also might be able to teach to others who may or may not be ready to listen right then. So, in the meantime you take care of yourself and learn to be kind to yourself until others might be ready to listen about how not to create more suffering in their own lives and others.

So, over time you become happy with your life because you learned not to buy into other's expectations of you that are completely unrealistic and only lead to your insanity. So, being compassionate to yourself you separate yourself from any unrealistic expectations.

Then you become free in your realizations and become a natural benefit to all mankind directly and indirectly.