Why I didn't become a professional musician

I had many fantasies about this at the time (60s and 70s). I remember one of my ideas was a group called "Purple Lightning" after Saint Germain. So, I was pretty surprised when Saint Germain actually created purple rain and lightning for me which kept on an on for several hours in Rewalsar or "Tsopema" in Tibetan in 1986 around Lotsar in Rewalsar or Tsopema as the Tibetans called it in India where we were then.

But, first and foremost I am a "Holy spirit Bringer" when I play or sing music. This is a natural thing for me and was for my mother also. So, I was always okay playing or singing in the choir in church with my Mom and Dad and friends all singing too. Or I was okay playing the Concert Grand Steinway in the Los Angeles Church or the 10,000 dollar Baldwin Organ.  (I even got good at pedaling) which is kind of like hitting the bass notes on a bass guitar or fiddle.

But, what I noticed was when people like me played from a Holy Spirit place it caused harm sometimes in a chaotic kind of way when there were people there someplace smoking and drinking or doing Cocaine or other things. So, I didn't want the Holy Spirit Energy God Brought through me to be perverted or be misused.

For example, the same energy that runs a Prius Hybrid that saves Gas or a Tesla could also be used to fire up an Electric Chair and kill someone (Demon possessed people(some would know how to do this). I didn't want to bring through the holy spirit and then let a demon sort of fuck it all up like when someone metaphorically shoots a unicorn with an arrow and then cuts his or her horn off.

So, this is why I refused to become a professional musician. I couldn't take responsibility for what negative beings would do with the holy spirit energy that flowed through me in an unlimited way from God.

I am a responsible meta physician and it is important to me to take responsibility for the infinite God power God sends through me. Otherwise, I would be killed by God for misusing his Holy spirit power no questions asked. This is just how it is.