Monday, March 7, 2016

If you lose everything of meaning in your life:

you die, even if your body lives. The first time I experienced this I was 21. But, if you survive this without going insane or committing suicide, you become very strong and what I would call, "A Ghost who walks". This wasn't the only time I had to go through something like this so even though I wished for death from 21 to 24 or 25, it made me what is called a Natural Shaman.

Because in my Cultural Anthropology book then around 1971 it defined a Natural Shaman as: "someone who has psychologically died but their body hasn't. And so because of this they are as comfortable in the land of the dead as in the land of the living." This was my experience too.

Though I was always very intuitive before this I became much more so and was able to help friends better who were suicidal and those who needed psychological or physical healing. I just became a more useful friend and a much more compassionate friend to everyone I knew after this experience.

My way of not committing suicide during this time or going insane were my girlfriends. If I was with a girlfriend who loved me I stayed alive for her so she wouldn't have to see me die. I also stayed alive for my parents and friends so they wouldn't have to deal with my death either. Eventually, I married my live in girlfriend and we had a son when I was 26 and then I had a reason to stay alive separate from a girlfriend or even a wife. I needed to stay alive to raise my son right to adulthood, then then as my other children were born including my step kids in my second marriage from my 2nd wife's first marriage and my son who I got custody of I had more and more reasons to stay alive no matter how I might feel in my life. This was good.

Because if you are a natural care giver this is the meaning of your life anyway to care for others. So, you don't live to care for yourself anyway, you mostly live to care for others because if you are alone you might not choose to stay alive anyway. At least this is my experience in my life. So, your life is about caring for all others in your life or around you in all ways as a service to life and to God.

No comments: