Chuck Lorre Productions #407

Note: I was watching the latest "Big Bang Theory" which I learned by the way today is the most popular sitcom as of last fall 2012 on TV, just past Raj trying to climb out a window you will see this if you have a DVR and then you can pause it and actually read this Blurb. He writes one of these at the end of everyone of his episodes. Also, notice the 3d printer that Wolowitz and Raj use to make little plastic models of themselves that Wolowitz dresses up like Superheroes.

Begin quote:
As I feel more and more alone, my phone confidently connects with everyone. As I feel more and more lost, my phone calmly know how to get anywhere. As I struggle to remember mundane things like the name of that movie with the boat and the guy with the lip, my phone smugly recalls literally everything. As I increasingly lose the nouns, verbs and adjectives that once stood ready to articulate my thoughts, my phone taunts me with it's instant access to all the words that have ever been. There is only one possible conclusion. slowly, without realizing it, I seem to have outsourced my mind to my phone. And to make matters worse, the damn thing knows it... and it's starting to screw wiht me. several times during the day I feel it buzz in my pocket, alerting me that some vital information has just arrived. The, when I look, there's nothing there. No email. No text. Nothing. Was the buzz in my mind? I don't think so. I think it's purposeful. I htink my phone is mocking me. And it's not just my phone. It's all of them. They are working together, systematically robbing us of our intelligence, our humanity. And then, when we are made stupid and helpless, they will take over. It's just a matter of time before the next generation of Iphone is equipped with an opposable thumb. Oh yeah, they're smart alright. Evil, world domination smart.

I have to call people and tell them...Oh, Great, now I have no bars! Dear God, what is happening?!

end quote from Chuck Lorre Productions #407 from tonights big bang called, "The Spoiler Alert Segmentation.

I think this is why almost a year ago now I subconsciously washed my phone in the Washing Machine. A week or two earlier I spoke with an old friend who couldn't really see much anymore but who I had gone to a Tibetan Buddhist empowerment with in Santa Cruz during the 1980s with. When I showed him my Iphone4 he said, "Those things are evil. I wouldn't have one if you gave it to me."

A couple of weeks later trying to pull out my "volunteer poison oak" from the back yard one day, I was so concentrating on Not getting poison oak on me or accidentally giving it to a member of my family that when I put everything I had on in the wash I remember 10 minutes later my Iphone4 was in the pocket. Strangely enough, I really wasn't that sad. It was like breaking up with an old girlfriend that I was addicted to but knowing the relationship really couldn't go on. It could not lead to getting married or having children. You know what I mean.

My wife was ecstatic about my washing the Iphone4 in the wash. She danced around happy about it. She thought it was an abomination that took my time away from her. And since I tend to be a technophile in some ways she was right. I was happy I washed it because I didn't like my wherabouts being tracked everywhere I went mostly in real time with graphs and all that etc.

So, mostly now I just use my son's old LG which was an early touchscreen not even a smartphone. I got one of the newer Ipad's with internet anywhere with extremely high resolution which is better now than likely any flatscreen made. So, now I feel like my life is in order once again. I can't run my Ipad through the wash because it won't fit into my jeans pockets (or any pants pockets that I might wash). My wife isn't mad at me because I don't sound like I'm talking underwater like I did on my Iphone4 with the speakerphone on (because that is the only way I would use it unless I was using a microphone and ear buds combination or talking hands free in my 4wd truck. So, life is good once again. The speakerphone mode on my LG is working fine and really loud even if it is a little tinny sounding. But I always can understand even without my hearing aids what is being said. My LG stopped being able to send texts but it still can receive them. But for some reason that suites me fine. All's well with the world.