Thursday, October 25, 2012


Every since I can remember October (for me) is the single most depressing time of year. If you have noticed in my blogs I'm kind of stressed out in October. I tend to feel the pain of life more. I think there are many reasons for this. Here are some of the reasons that I can think of that October stresses me out more than any other.

So, if I approach this as an intuitive and look back to when I started to feel this way I think it was during Kindergarten. I was really excited to go to school after having been relegated to having to always be with my mother and grandmother all the time while my father worked during the week. So, I wanted to be with kids my own age. Most of the time that didn't happen because I was an only child. So, then we moved the summer I turned 4 to Vista, California in 1952 from Seattle, Washington where I was born. When I started kindergarten in Vista I had to ride a bus alone at age 5 and go to 2 different grade schools because we moved to El Cajon to a larger home in the middle of the fall, (likely in October). The new school was larger and then I got chicken pox likely because I had already moved from Seattle and now we moved again to El Cajon which is a lot of moving within a year or two for a 4 to 5 year old.

So, I think what happened was it is always good to see all your friends in September when school starts in California in the 1950s. But, by October the fun has all worn off and one is left with the awful truth of having to sit still listening to some idiot force you to listen to things you don't almost ever want to hear about.

Now, don't get me wrong I have always had a love of learning. However, being bored ((literally to death) I have never liked at all. So, people forcing me to listen to stuff that was incredibly boring and forcing me to wake up to bore me to death only made me hate these people. So, my experience of Grade School from the start was of being a prisoner and hating it. However, I was always very smart and was always figuring out ways to make this incredibly boring time more bearable. One of the ways was day dreaming which I was really good at and this became the basis of me becoming a writer by the time I was 8 or 9 that was recognized by my teachers for my writing composition, spelling and storytelling abilities.

But, to this day I always am sort of distressed by Octobers and I think it comes from feeling of being imprisoned by public schools in the 1950s. So, after growing up October is still the most upsetting time of year (at least until November 1st) which is All Saints Day" and the beginning of the Seven Sacred Weeks of Christmas when I experience the heaven realms coming back close to earth after the Day of the Dead (Halloween occurs). As a lifelong intuitive October is mostly about a whole lot of ghosts roaming the earth which is uncomfortable for an intuitive who can feel this. Though I'm not afraid of ghosts anymore it still isn't a comfortable feeling with so many unhappy ghosts flitting about the month of October. But,  the ghosts who are mostly earthbound because of not going to the heaven realms for one reason or another, or the ones who visit their relatives from heaven realms are visiting their relatives on earth during this month mostly in their dreams and thoughts both waking and sleeping. So, it is their chance to renew old acquaintances both for good or for ill or for neutral reasons.

This is one reason why the Tibetan lamas say, "Treat all beings with kindness, because over time friends become enemies and enemies become friends." It is the nature of all karmic cycles. So, if you are kind to all beings all the time your karmic cycle then becomes more bearable and will not pull you into becoming an unhappy earthbound ghost at some point or another.

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