One of the things I had to do to survive the last 4 days was not to eat. It started with dehydration (I'm still now sure how I got so dehydrated I couldn't keep any food or water down. So, this required a saline IV to cure my dehydration before I died from it from throwing up. Then I had terrible cramps in my interestines (possibly caused by severe dehydration) and since the pain was so bad I begged for pain killer because it was so awful. The only thing they could give me was Morphine in a drip (which also causes extreme constipation. So, we have this viscious circle going on here. Then I'm now at 3500 feet and I'm used to sea level and I throw up my heart medicine (very bad during a change of altitude like his). So, they put me on oxygen. I was somewhat of a happy camper on morpheine, oxygen and a saline drip because a few hours before I didn't see how I was going to make it through the night. So, getting my friends to drive me to the emergency room saved my life (from my perspective and age)
However, even though the pain stayed acute from not being able to eat any solid food for 4 days (because I was completely constipated (not even gas could pass) which made the pain much worse I woke up this morning to realize I might even have an intestinal obstruction which might require surgery. But, about an hour before I was going to return to the Emergency room to have a sonogram to see if this was the case my bowels finally let loose because the morphine effect had worn off.
Pretty crazy anyway you look at it.
But, what it reminded me of is just how focused you have to be on the minimum required to stay alive in a situation like this. You can't panic or you are dead. You have to tell all your friends and family that you cannot talk to them because you are too weak to do this. You are even too weak to watch TV or read or blog most of the time. So, you are basically screwed and wondering whether you are going to survive all this?
But, the paradox is that at the same time I was having a Vision quest kind of experience that reminded me a lot like the 4 day no water no food one I did under the tutelage of a native American Medicine man around 1983 in the summer.
So, I was having visions and halucinating like crazy. Only last night did my halucinations get a little scary but always before pretty much it was very powerful spiritual beings coming to me and talking to me and telling me how to survive this. From the beginning visions they told me I likely would survive this. So, when very evolved beings tell you something like this it can be very reassuring even though the actuality of what you are going through is just so overwhelming in one's late 60s that one might not see how surviving something like this would be possible?
But, Angels and truly evolved spiritual beings I find that if I listen to them they are pretty much 100% correct.
So, I'm grateful for all the help and prayers from everyone everywhere that sent a good thought in my direction. Because I'm still alive today because of it and can imagine being alive now 1 week from now too.
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