Monday, December 7, 2009

Tiger Woods- a different point of view

This hasn't been mentioned by the Press at all as far as I have seen.

Also, this isn't to excuse Tiger's behavior as nothing can do that but rather to explain it in a rational way.

In case no one noticed Tiger's father passed away May 5th 2006. I think if anyone researched his affairs they likely began in the next year after this. If he is a love addict, however, he may have been like this since High School. Since I don't know Tiger personally I wouldn't know the answer to this question. If he is a love addict then women to such a person are like a drug and he probably needs to go to one of the AA type of meetings for love addicts if he wants to stay married and raise his kids.

If you have a disciplinarian for a father like Tiger obviously did to start him golfing almost before he walked then you understand the dynamics. My father was a disciplinarian too. So was my father in laws. And when my father in laws father died so did his marriage and when my Dad died so did my marriage. Often if one has a disciplinarian for a father and who is bigger than life like a John Wayne or a Clint Eastwood type of person then one becomes a lover of women as a reaction to this type of father especially if one is handsome and well behaved which one tends to become with a father like this.

Also, with a disciplinarian for a father one can never be oneself. So, demonstrating individuality you give up with a father like this. So, often one becomes identified with being a lover and pleaser of women because one needs an identity other than the one that one's father creates. Men who love and care about their fathers don't want to disappoint their fathers. However, everyone needs their own individuality if they don't want to just become a robot and go insane eventually. So a son of a very strong disciplinarian type of father has to find a way to create his own individuality to cope.

Once Tiger's Dad died so did the structure he lived under all these years. The normal result is often a breakup of the son's marriage and family if that son hasn't sufficiently individuated from his father in his own mind.

To demonstrate this I lost my second wife to my father's death. I don't blame my father and I don't blame myself anymore either. It was just the hand I was dealt and it really couldn't have gone any other way for me at age 37. That Tiger was only about 30 or 31 when his Dad died only made this kind of thing worse. Yes. He is a Billionaire but his career might be over or not depending upon his fans. The problem is his fans(men) mostly have wives and girlfriends and this is his real problem now.

If he goes to a group (a love addicts anonymous kind of clone group) he might save his marriage if she wants to and he cares enough. However, either way Tiger needs to grow up. Yes, Tiger, your Dad died and it F---ed you up. But now you are a man and you just have to find a way to cope like the rest of us whose fathers died when we were still young.

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